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Naughtyboy50s
New member
Username: Naughtyboy50s
Post Number: 14
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Monday, May 22, 2006 - 09:50 pm: | 
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So you talk with someone you have met on-line-maybe here! What's the next step? Maybe you are located close to them (Your hearts are very close). Meet at a local store-Walmart maybe!
Your nervousness shows as you introduce yourself and proceed in. We agreed to go to the lingerie department first to break the awkward feeling! So what do you like to see your woman in-Well I dont know (but actually I do). We giggle as we sort thru the sexy clothing. How about something to eat-He asks-Oh yes please ,she answers nervously. They eat as they look into each others souls-Their wantings,desires-Needs!
Things are more relaxed now as they joke, kid and hold hands-Realizing how much they are so similiar.They leave and kiss-Not politely, but with a shared passion! |
Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 857
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, May 23, 2006 - 12:08 am: |
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Your version of meeting someone is a bit of a stretch for the reality of the situation, I'm afraid. It makes for a nice story but I would turn and run if a man I was meeting for the first time wanted to go lingerie shopping and in Wal-Mart, no less (no offense intended but this is a first date for pity's sake). That makes it sound like you're only in this for sex.
You might want to rethink this strategy. And since you're both here on the forum, I want to remind you of some things you need to think about. Whatever else, don't forget to have in place all your safety precautions for meeting someone for the first time. The biggest question is, have you been upfront about who you are, what your situation is (single or involved), and what kind of relationship you're looking for.
Meeting someone you've only known online is always serious business. If you're really planning to do this there are preparations to make that aren't all that romantic but are necessary. Proceed slowly and take precautions, have a safety-net in place such as an arranged safe call to someone who knows what you're doing and where you're supposed to be as well as a word you've agreed on that will let your friend know all is well, and exchanging driver's licenses or other material to prove you are who you say you are.
You can have the romance after your safety concerns have been answered, but until then proceed with caution.
Don't mean to put a damper on things, but this is serious and it sounds like you might need a reality check. |
Naughtyboy50s
New member
Username: Naughtyboy50s
Post Number: 15
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, May 23, 2006 - 05:04 am: |
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Bethie,
I'm sitting here with egg on my face. It was just fantasy and I put it in print. I didn't mean to scare anyone or send up red flags-I was just in a good mood after a stressful work day.
I understand your concerns. I am sorry. It won't happen again.
This is a wonderful site and I'm sorry I was the one to cause a reality check. |
Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 862
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, May 23, 2006 - 05:19 am: |
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Since it was here in the discussion area, I thought you were being serious. Next time you want to write out one of your fantasies, please post it in the reading area and tell us it's fiction. Thank you! |
Victoria_wood
Advanced Spanko
Username: Victoria_wood
Post Number: 141
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, May 23, 2006 - 08:05 am: |
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And since this is fantasy, maybe the lingerie department in Bloomingdale's, rather than Wal-Mart. LOL ;)
Cheers,
Victoria
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Shylah
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 997
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, May 23, 2006 - 08:22 am: |
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In a way, his fantasy might be a perfect way to use this thread to post some safety guidelines when meeting with anyone for the first time.
As Bethie said, it's tricky, and you need to take personal care to keep yourself safe and it doesn't make any difference if you are male or female. Personal safety is a MUST.
First...when you meet someone online or thru one of those personal ad sites, ask for identification. Be upfront. Tell them you want to check them out. Tell them you are only doing this for your own satisfaction that you are not setting yourself up for a dangerous situation. If they refuse...dump them.
Second...ALWAYS...ALWAYS meet in a public place the first and second time. Sit, have a drink...a meal...talk. Lay out the guidelines. Set limits. Agree on a safeword.
Third...Have someone closeby. They can be at another table to observe his/her actions. Body language tells lots. Pay attention to body language. Is he/she leering at you? Drooling? Making lewd remarks? Those are danger signals. Watch for that.
Fourth...Have a prearranged time to make a phone call to someone. Tell the person you are meeting that if you do not make this call at the designated time, the police will be called. Let them know that your whereabouts ARE KNOWN. Have your contact watch where you go. Get camera shots, get a car licence plate number. Get the name of hotel or house number.
Do these sound extreme??
YOU BET THEY ARE. And if you don't cover your butt, you are only setting yourself up for danger. Use your head. Use your common sense. Trust your instincts.
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Ladygator2904
Advanced Spanko
Username: Ladygator2904
Post Number: 113
Registered: 03-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, May 23, 2006 - 06:21 pm: |
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Nice suggestions Shylah 
A woman`s heart may be filled with an ocean of secrets but mine have all been released and I have a sore bottom to prove it!
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 2390
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, May 23, 2006 - 08:26 pm: |
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May I add a little something to Shylah's excellent suggestions? This check list is not just for females. Men can just as easily be at risk for a set up. I know Shylah did a good job making her suggestions for both genders, but I find that we tend to trust women more than men. So, whether the person you are meeting is female or male, care must be taken.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Ladygator2904
Advanced Spanko
Username: Ladygator2904
Post Number: 114
Registered: 03-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, May 23, 2006 - 08:31 pm: |
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ALthough Shylah gave some good advice I am a bit confused about something. I agree that this is a discussion area but Naughtyboy started with: So you talk with someone you have met on-line-maybe here! What's the next step? I took it to mean, he is a bit confused about how to make friends or meet someone on line and asking the den, whats the next step???? Correct me if I am wrong Naughty boy but is that the way this post started? If so, I can tell you that it is ok to meet someone on the net. I have done it numerous times and like your ending, a small kiss for friendship and we go on our ways, knowing a new friend with a old passion (spanking) so to speak. I agree with the women, I would not want to meet someone at wal mart and especially not in the lingerie dept. This is too much over the top and would scare your new friend away. I would much rather meet at starbucks and I don`t even drink coffee <g>... as far as your fantasy, it was nice but I think the moderators prefer it in a form of reading ... or stories.. is that right moderators? anyways, I hope we didn`t scare you off because this really is a good group of ppl who have similar likes and as they say, You jump, I jump (Jack Dawson Titanic) 
A woman`s heart may be filled with an ocean of secrets but mine have all been released and I have a sore bottom to prove it!
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Tom6789ca
New member
Username: Tom6789ca
Post Number: 18
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, May 24, 2006 - 12:57 am: |
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I agree we all need a good reality check now and again, and safety is important, BUT .... I would advise against giving any personal identification information (eg, drivers licence, social insurance number, date of birth, real family name, etc) to a stranger over the internet: identity theft is becoming a huge problem, and phishing happens everywhere now. For the same reason, I never send my photo over the internet. The time to give real information, IMO, is when you meet face to face for the first time, in public. Up till then, I think people are entitled to their privacy, especially if someone is not "out" about their kink, and a photo or anonymous message sent by a disgruntled colleague to your employer could mean losing your job. Just my opinion... would love to hear what others think... |
Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 872
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, May 24, 2006 - 01:10 am: |
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The tips we gave earlier in this thread are for when you are preparing to meet someone in person, not just for chatting online. Personal identification information such as a driver's license and a real name is very important information. That is information you can give to whomever you've picked to be your safe person. Someone needs to know who you are going to meet and they need solid information in case anything happens.
You should always have that information before you go to meet someone. Anyone can say they are anyone on the net so solid information is necessary. Like Shylah said, if they refuse that info, dump them.
You shouldn't just give that info out to just anyone you meet online, but if you're going to meet that person face-to-face, you have to have it.
Tom provided some good points about giving out your personal information to online acquaintances. If someone you've just met online asks you for your personal information, proceed with caution. No one needs that information until you've gotten to the point of meeting and that should be after much communication and trust has been gained on both sides.
(Message edited by bethie on May 23, 2006) |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 2397
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, May 24, 2006 - 02:02 pm: |
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Another point, I would avoid alcohol at a first meeting, and also watch your drink. Something can be added while you are not looking.
I would want to be fully aware of all that is going on.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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