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Robinredtail
New member
Username: Robinredtail
Post Number: 6
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, May 31, 2006 - 02:02 pm: | 
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You might have noticed in other posts of mine that I have said I want gf and me to "branch out". What I meant by that is that I want to implement at least some parts of DD (punishment and maintenance spankings). Then, I went into the Den archives and saw mention of "stress release" spankings.
So, with all the possible types of spankings, how did you start? What kind of maintenance schedule were you on at the beginning? What schedule are you on now (if you still do maintenance spankings, that is)?
Basically, what do we need to know/think about before getting started? Please address punishment, maintenance and stress release, or as many as you can.
Any advice/comments/suggestions are welcome!
Robin 
"Gimme that strange relationship
Never knew pleasure and pain like this..."
-Darren Hayes
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Ladygator2904
Advanced Spanko
Username: Ladygator2904
Post Number: 141
Registered: 03-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, May 31, 2006 - 02:27 pm: |
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Hi Robin, my husband and I have been into DD for about 3 months now. I started by reading most of the threads as well as other sites on the net. I have found when I need a maintenance spanking which averages every other day now. I simply pick the implement had it to my husband and smile. He knows just how long and hard to go.... I think he judges it by my breathing and squirms. When I need a punishment spanking (sometimes daily bcause I am a brat) he picks the impliment and the duration. Although I dont like the pain, I love the euphoria afterwards and the way it has bought us so close that no man will put us under <g>. As far as schedules.. should I say daily? A spanking a day keeps the doctor away. lol.. just kidding, we have no schedule there is no need for one. Hope this helps. I am sure you will find out what works for you and it doesnt take long!
A woman`s heart may be filled with an ocean of secrets but mine have all been released and I have a sore bottom to prove it!
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Tammynx
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Tammynx
Post Number: 600
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, May 31, 2006 - 02:51 pm: |
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Robin...Ladygator is right you just have to try things out and see what works for you.
My husband and I don't do maintance spankings.
For stress releif..its just as needed. He can see when I'm stressed...and if he can't I tell him.
He is the one that decides punishment spankings.
Commuication will get you started. Keep talking it will come to you both. Trial and error. |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 2446
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, May 31, 2006 - 03:02 pm: |
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My husband and I have been in spanking and then DD for over 20 years. We started young while we were at university together before we married. Our lifestyle has changed throughout the years as we otherselves have changed. Sometimes spanking has been a bigger part of our relationship and at other times it was almost nonexistant. We started out with erotic spanking only, until one day he decided to discipline me because I said I had no motivation. It worked and I discovered that I responand that I did not mind being disciplined, I actually needed it. We started maintaince spankings when "too" long of a time occured between needed discipline spankings. The maintaince spankings are what are great as stress reducers. When either of us go too long without me being spanked, tension starts to build up, so before it turns nasty, we relieve the stress. I don't go longer than a week between spankings, because if I haven't been spanked all week, Sunday evening I know there will be a maintaince one. We also do a lot of mock discipline, because believe it or not sometimes I am just that good. We have no average week, some times it will be one spanking a week, other times it can be 15-20. Mostly it depends on our moods, time restrainsts and what else is going on in our lives.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Robinredtail
New member
Username: Robinredtail
Post Number: 7
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, May 31, 2006 - 04:38 pm: |
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Thanks to everybody for your comments and suggestions!
As for not using a schedule, that might not work too well for us since we don't live together and she has more family obligations (and therefore less free time) than I do. We will probably have to do a little more planning than those couples that are living together.
"Gimme that strange relationship
Never knew pleasure and pain like this..."
-Darren Hayes
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 2449
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, May 31, 2006 - 05:51 pm: |
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Try having six kids living with you Robin, and you will learn} how to plan these events.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Katie_spades
Advanced Spanko
Username: Katie_spades
Post Number: 496
Registered: 11-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, June 06, 2006 - 08:21 pm: |
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My fiance and I have been practising DD since we've been together, our first date even, lol... but he believe is MS so we do it but haven't in awhile - he used to every 3 weeks regardless of other punishments but with so much else going on, we haven't kept this up, yet I'm sure when everything settles down, Jake will have no problem returning to it, LOL...
The Princess of Spanking
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Little_miss
New member
Username: Little_miss
Post Number: 18
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, June 06, 2006 - 08:28 pm: |
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me and Adam do maintenance spanking every night...it's pretty much scheduled. The only thing is, if i'm good it's not very hard and not very long. If not than i get punished twice...once when it happens and again before bed
it's pretty rough but it works for us...we usually plan out spankings because we don't live alone.
"Lately it just seems to me like we have the letters ADD branded into our mentality"
~Reliant K
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Katie_spades
Supreme Spanko
Username: Katie_spades
Post Number: 514
Registered: 11-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 07, 2006 - 01:28 am: |
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How can you take it every night? Is it with a hand or with implements as well? Inquiring minds want to know.
The Princess of Spanking
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Victoria_wood
Advanced Spanko
Username: Victoria_wood
Post Number: 180
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 07, 2006 - 09:02 am: |
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If you get spanked every night, what is the incentive to behave? Isn't is kind of harsh to get punished every night?
Cheers,
Victoria
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Victoria_wood
Advanced Spanko
Username: Victoria_wood
Post Number: 184
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 07, 2006 - 10:35 am: |
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Katie,
I'd love to hear the story about how you and Jake did DD on the first date. Care to share?
Cheers,
Victoria
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Otter
Advanced Spanko
Username: Otter
Post Number: 103
Registered: 03-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 07, 2006 - 10:45 am: |
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I think the incentive to behave is that she only gets it once if she does, LOL.
We do DD, in fact that is the focus of our spanking. Even when I am getting a "maintenance/gg/stress release" spanking, he still frames it in a "you've been behaving really well and we want it to stay that way, so this spanking is to remind you of who makes the rules and why you want to obey them" sort of light. They are more of a preemptive type thing, though sometimes he will tell me I'm getting it just because he wants to or he thinks I need it. We try to get in some sort of spanking (whether I need it or not) at least once every weekend and then I usually end up getting one in the middle of the week sometime because I need it.
When we started, we had a couple of rules (no spending without asking as I had a problem with that then and no smoking). We still only have a couple standing rules but they are a bit different. Our original rules are mostly moot now. He also used to say, "If you do this, you will get this many hacks. If you do that, you will get that many hacks." He doesn't do that anymore. Now the punishment is just a spanking (or more if he thinks it was really bad) and then he decides how long and how much it takes. The punishment and the correction lies mostly in the lecture and the verbal message. The spanking is mostly just something to clear the air and reconnect us.
I got most of my first spankings, however, when he told me to do things and then I didn't do them. I was supposed to clean the office and I didn't. I was supposed to do something else and i didn't. I got a couple for forgetting to close the door on my way out. I got a couple for smoking. Now I mostly get them for bad attitude and shooting off my mouth or for the eating that leads to those behaviors. I don't break the concrete rules too much anymore, most of the cranky brattiness I get punished for is caused by being overdue for a spanking anyway, LOL.
HTH.
o*
"Sometimes love don't feel like it should." -John Cougar
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Little_miss
New member
Username: Little_miss
Post Number: 20
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 07, 2006 - 01:22 pm: |
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Adam uses a hairbrush usually for maitenance spankings. If i'm good, they're only light and only hurt very little..it's pleasurable...but if he thinks that i wasn't good than it's anything but. The incentive to behave is that i'll enjoy it if i do and as Otter said, i only get it once.
the only thing that seems a bit harsh about it is that if Adam hits a bits hard (and he always does for a few) and i complain or whine about it than i get spanked more...the only reason that's harsh though, is because i whine a lot. LoL
"Lately it just seems to me like we have the letters ADD branded into our mentality"
~Reliant K
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Sarahsbrat
New member
Username: Sarahsbrat
Post Number: 12
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, June 15, 2006 - 05:50 am: |
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The very first thing you need to do is talk. Then talk some more. When Sarah and I first decided that this is what we both wanted we talked and then found there was so much more to talk about.
Ours is a Top/brat relationship so it's a little different from the bulk of the DD homes here where most are married couples I think.
I get spanked for disobedience, like cheekiness, snarkiness, stoppy attitudes, or things that could hurt me, like hitch-hiking, eating foods that agrravate my stomach condition or breaking rules. <under age related edited>
I get a Maintainence spanking on Tuesdays and usually with her paddle. Sometimes she does a warm up with the hairbrush first. If I've been good it's usually just a few swats, but if I haven't then it's a lot more serious.
She's done stress spankings once in a while, like when I've not been able to sleep for a few nights or have been exceptionally cranky. Since we have a few implements it changes all the time. Nothing is set in stone.
(Message edited by fanny on June 15, 2006)
Not just any naughty brat...Sarahsbrat
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