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Message |
    
Faye
New member
Username: Faye
Post Number: 3
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Friday, June 09, 2006 - 12:57 pm: | 
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Hi all,
I am new here! I started a conversation on the meet and greet board and thought it should be here. Go back and read it to get the full situation. Anyways, last night I got a little attitudy about something and we have been e-mailing each other back and forth and he says I am going to get it tonight for that. Now we usually do just foreplay spankings but I am dying to jump into DD. I've been thinking about it and reading about it for two years now and it is time to try and jump in. I am thinking tonight is the night that I want to tell him. I found a really good article that I am going to show him. I am so nervous, wish me luck!!! |
Shylah
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 1093
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Friday, June 09, 2006 - 01:17 pm: |
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First...thank you for realizing that the Meet and Greet section is not for discussions.
Next...I hope your meeting tonight is all you dream of and more!!!
Let us know how it went!!!
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Double_trouble
New member
Username: Double_trouble
Post Number: 9
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Friday, June 09, 2006 - 01:19 pm: |
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Faye--
Good luck and welcome. I hope you get your bottom soundly spanked. Here's a thought: if you guys have been doing this sexually for a while (like me and my wife), he might have a hard time just spanking you and without the fun follow up. Have him spank you earlier in the day or evening and delay the sex until later. It might not be exactly what you want but it's moving in the right direction. |
Pinkcheeks
Supreme Spanko
Username: Pinkcheeks
Post Number: 514
Registered: 12-2005
| | Posted on Friday, June 09, 2006 - 01:31 pm: |
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Faye...hi!
I think you are VERY wise to read up on DD and show your hubby well written articles about this topic. My husband and I did a lot of talking before we actually decided on "punishment" spankings (we are not a true DD couple). We had been doing good girl spankings and erotic spankings, but I wanted it to go to the next level. It was thru lots of discussion that we decided what was right for us.
BTW...Double_trouble brings up an excellent point 
Best of luck tonight....and yes, keep us posted!
"Thought I WAS being a good girl...really I did!"
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Ladygator2904
Advanced Spanko
Username: Ladygator2904
Post Number: 155
Registered: 03-2006
| | Posted on Friday, June 09, 2006 - 06:49 pm: |
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Hi Faye,
I read about and introduced my husband to DD about 4 months ago now. We did not do any kind of spanking before. Nothing.. not even playful good girl spankings .. sigh... So, I emailed him several interesting posts from the den and I also emailed him a website on dd. He was out of town and actually couldnt read his email. When he came home I told him to carefully read all his emails. He had a few questions and we spent memorial weekend full of 4 days of spankings some goodgirl, one long running and long overdue punshishment one. We have since purchased a few implements. May I suggest you have an implement purchansed (a wooden hairbrush for example) in case hubby asks. I hope you find what you so want and need. Luck to you!
A woman`s heart may be filled with an ocean of secrets but mine have all been released and I have a sore bottom to prove it!
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Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 925
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Friday, June 09, 2006 - 11:52 pm: |
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I think we all got confused because part of Faye's request is in the Meet and Greet Area and the other half is here. Faye, hon, when you get a chance, let me know if we're on the right course in this discussion.
Just to help out, here's the relevant part of Faye's post from the Meet and Greet Area:
"Well, a while back I had him read a bunch of posts and other DD websites and he seemed interested. He said, it seems like some people want to be spanked for disipline. I asked him how he felt about that and he kinda said he'd rather just stick to it being sexual. I just agreed because i wasn't ready to admit it yet. We've kinda dropped it and have just been doing the erotic thing. Last night I got a good spanking and it was long and hard but it was a foreplay spanking. I am longing for this DD lifestyle and I just don't know how to tell him. So he knows all about it and trust me, he's not afraid of hurting me. I just have to tell him thats what I want and hope he goes along with it. Well, I'm in for another one tonight so maybe afterwards I'll try and tell him. Then maybe we can get a set of rules to follow. I think he'll like that idea Hmmm, maybe this should be on the discussion board??" |
Faye
New member
Username: Faye
Post Number: 4
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Saturday, June 10, 2006 - 12:14 pm: |
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Hi everybody!
Wow, thanks for all the responses and support! This is great. No, you didn't go off topic because that is a huge concern of mine also. I KNOW for a fact that spanking me turns him on and he will NOT be able to resist sex afterwards. I just don't think its possible, lol. I do need to know if its o.k. I don't think he'll be able to resist. So its good to know that its o.k, too. I'll just tell him that its up to him whether we have sex or not since he is the one "in charge". Thats kind of a turn on though!
But anyways, not much has happened and no I didn't twll him last night, grrr. We both feel asleep early. I will though and I will keep you all posted!
Thanks you so much!!! |
Otter
Advanced Spanko
Username: Otter
Post Number: 108
Registered: 03-2006
| | Posted on Saturday, June 10, 2006 - 04:20 pm: |
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Actually, Faye, my hubby will sometimes make me "service" him after a spanking and then we just go to bed. I don't get to orgasm. It's not really an extension of the punishment so much as a show of his authority/dominance and a demonstration of my submission. At least, that is how it feels to me. As I said, I often don't need to orgasm after a spanking.
HTH and good luck! It's incredible when you get the right fit for you...
o*
"Sometimes love don't feel like it should." -John Cougar
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Faye
New member
Username: Faye
Post Number: 5
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Saturday, June 10, 2006 - 07:38 pm: |
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Grrr, I was all pumped up and ready to tell him what I want and now I'm not sure!! I mean, I know I want this, I just can't get up the courage to tell him! I don't know why. I have to tell him, I can't just go on wishing. Its not like I am introducing spanking for the first time, we already do it, and hard too! I just don't know if he's going to go for the whole punishment thing. Ahhhh, we'll see if I do it! |
Nicenick06
New member
Username: Nicenick06
Post Number: 6
Registered: 02-2006
| | Posted on Saturday, June 10, 2006 - 07:57 pm: |
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Tell him, coax him, urge him...
Tell him if he loves you then you need this.
I think sex would be good after this as well.
Sorry Shylah. |
Blistering_blonde
Advanced Spanko
Username: Blistering_blonde
Post Number: 221
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Saturday, June 10, 2006 - 08:14 pm: |
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Just do it !
You will Love it ...after
and I usually have sex after a spanking ...why not the punishment is over??? Unless he states before the punishment begins, that while during it I am not to orgasam. I find that after a D/d I feel a stronger attentive love
good artical in here www.traditionalspanking.com/
He asked what I needed , timidly gave it at first, now he just knows.
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Faye
New member
Username: Faye
Post Number: 6
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Saturday, June 10, 2006 - 08:17 pm: |
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Yeah, I'm gonna do it. I'm young, we've been married for 5 years, I don't want to live the next 20 years wishing we could live this way, I actually want to live this way now!!! I think he will have no problem with being in charge, he already tries to be but I can be a brat. I think once we get going he will love this new lifestyle. I just have to do it!!! We get to spend the whole day together tomorrow and after the kiddos go to bed I will tell him, one way or another!!!! I'll keep you all posted. |
Blistering_blonde
Advanced Spanko
Username: Blistering_blonde
Post Number: 222
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Saturday, June 10, 2006 - 08:22 pm: |
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YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 
You go let him get you girl *S* you will LOVE it and wonder WHY did you wait *S* happy spankings
He asked what I needed , timidly gave it at first, now he just knows.
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Faye
New member
Username: Faye
Post Number: 7
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Saturday, June 10, 2006 - 09:02 pm: |
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Thanks, I'm still nervous but I'm going to do it, I can't wait until tomorrow night! |
Nicenick06
New member
Username: Nicenick06
Post Number: 13
Registered: 02-2006
| | Posted on Sunday, June 11, 2006 - 02:29 am: |
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I agree with blistering blonde ….
Too me sex after a speaking whether punishment or fun is the reason d’ etre…
Problem is Faye has been trying to introduce domestic discipline but has not yet persuaded her partner to do just that. The partner probably thinks that there is a barrier he should not cross. Of course some people can’t cross that barrier… Vanilla sex and mild spanking is the all. Sounds to me as if Kaye needs something stronger.
Can’t wait to find out…. |
Faye
New member
Username: Faye
Post Number: 8
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Sunday, June 11, 2006 - 12:29 pm: |
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O.k, I haven't quite come out with it yeat but I have been hinting at it a lot! He is going along with it too. I am just trying to get a feel for how he feels about it before I tell him exactly what I want. Doing it slowly but surely :o) He says I'm getting one tonight because I've been bad 
He is still joking around when he says it but he is slowly getting it! He spanks me hard though so at least I know there is no fear of hurting me. I know some men have that. I think maybe he has even thought about actually spanking me for disipline but thinks I wouldn't want that, so really I should just come out with it! Yes, I do need more than just the plain old light spanking and vanilla sex. I need to be put in my place thats for sure! |
Shylah
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 1105
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Sunday, June 11, 2006 - 05:42 pm: |
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Faye, I hope you get everything you are hoping for.
You go girl!!
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Faye
New member
Username: Faye
Post Number: 9
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Monday, June 12, 2006 - 08:48 am: |
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Um no I didn't, but I did finally come out with it!!! Thats a big step. He actually likes the idea but all of a sudden he doesn't want to hurt me?? LOL, thats new. I think he is coming around, he loves the whole idea os it he just has to get past the guilt of "punishing me" I think we'll get there. Thanks guys! |
Victoria_wood
Advanced Spanko
Username: Victoria_wood
Post Number: 230
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Monday, June 12, 2006 - 08:54 am: |
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Good for you!
It occurs to me that when you say "punish," he probably thinks that means even harder spankings. But a lot of people on this site and others say that punishment spankings are not necessarily harder -- in fact they may be lighter. It's the psychological mindset that is different. That may reassure him. I think there are a lot of threads on here about the topic that may help.
Cheers,
Victoria
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Faye
New member
Username: Faye
Post Number: 10
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Monday, June 12, 2006 - 10:02 am: |
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Yeah I think thats what it is because let me tell you during "play" spankings he really lets me have it, like he even bruised me (by accident, I bruise easily) now all of a sudden he is scared. He is afraid he is going to turn into a monster. I think he is just suprised that I actually want this and he needs a minute to get used to the idea. he does think the whole thing is a great idea though, him being in charge and all, haha I new he would. I can't wait to get the ball rolling! |
Victoria_wood
Advanced Spanko
Username: Victoria_wood
Post Number: 231
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Monday, June 12, 2006 - 10:10 am: |
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I think a lot of men have issues b/c they are taught not to hit women, and in some circles, not to be dominant towards women, and also they don't want to be seen as batterers -- all of which is a good thing. The comment that resonated with my partner is "it's not violence if it's consensual."
Also with all the negative images in the media about kinky people and the myth that SM, if you call it that, is addictive, people get scared.
Cheers,
Victoria
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Faye
New member
Username: Faye
Post Number: 11
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Monday, June 12, 2006 - 10:42 am: |
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Well, he's a greed to try it. We'll see how this goes, I am very excited! |
Double_trouble
New member
Username: Double_trouble
Post Number: 13
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 14, 2006 - 09:00 pm: |
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Hey Guys--
Nothing like saying something and then leaving the room
Faye, many of us are still trying to figure this out. That's part of the reason were here. Sometimes partners have a hard time with the psychology of punishment. It's hard to know what is enough or too much. Just reassure him that you won't let him really hurt you. |
Tina
New member
Username: Tina
Post Number: 11
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 14, 2006 - 09:12 pm: |
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Can someone point me to a good DD site please. |
Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 952
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 14, 2006 - 10:01 pm: |
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Tina, have you ever been to The Punishment Book? I'm not into DD myself, so maybe I'm not the one to ask, but I think the ladies there do a great job writing about their lives.
Also, if you have a specific question, just post it here. We have members who practice DD and would be happy to answer your questions.
I hope you don't mind, but I'll probably start a new thread with your post later tonight. I hate to hijack Faye's thread. |
Blistering_blonde
Advanced Spanko
Username: Blistering_blonde
Post Number: 247
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 14, 2006 - 10:14 pm: |
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here is another Tina
www.spankoz.net/spencer_text.htm
this Lady is credited for fine tuning the idea of D/d
Its also a docament that you sign and agree to with your spouse (or use it as exsample to make your own.
He asked what I needed , timidly gave it at first, now he just knows.
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Faye
New member
Username: Faye
Post Number: 12
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, June 15, 2006 - 01:49 pm: |
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Hi guys!
Just an update, he is currantly reading a bunch of info that I have sent him. He is totally into it and as soon as he reads through it all he says he'll be ready to give it a try. He is turned on by the whole thing as well. We have agreed on a list of rules that I am to follow and punishments if I don't. I have been following them for two days now and we both have noticed how much happier we have been. Everything is done early and we have more time for us in the evening. he is happy with it so far. He has given me a chore to do, which is a huge turn on. If its not done by the time limit he set he is going to use his belt on me (something we have done before during "playtime" but yes it does HURT!) I don't think I am going to use this to "test" him. I think I am actually going to get it done but I do want to see if he is serious. I am sure it won't be long before I break some rules without even trying to and then I will see if he is serious! Thanks guys for all your support and I will keep you posted. |
Faye
New member
Username: Faye
Post Number: 13
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, June 20, 2006 - 10:53 am: |
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Hi Everybody!
Tonight is the night! I was informed that I would be punished tonight for my attitude!! Holy Moses, I'll let you all know how it goes! I have to admit, I'm slightly nervous, he said he'd be using a wooden spoon! Oh my God! Well, I wanted this right?? I'm ready |
Weasel
Spanko
Username: Weasel
Post Number: 55
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, June 20, 2006 - 11:07 am: |
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Oh Faye, I'll bet you are getting butterflies in your belly the size of 747s! I get it with the spoon, and it can get really stingy! You really wanted this, I remember reading it further back up the thread!
Enjoy and savor, Faye, enjoy your delicious evening!
Some day you'll spank me... er thank me for this!
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Faye
New member
Username: Faye
Post Number: 14
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 21, 2006 - 08:53 pm: |
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Ahhh, so heres what happened...I woke up Tuesday deathly ill and layed on the couch all day. He said he couldn't punish me sick so it would have to wait until I'm better  I wasn't up to it anyways. So I am feeling 100% better today, I guess it was a 24 hour bug because I feel great! I have been pushing his buttons all day and he said I am getting it very soon. He even gave me a preveiw with the wooden spoon, a few swats and OUCH it hurt!  It might be tonight, tomorrow or Friday so I am very anxious! I have been waiting for this for a while and I think its coming soon. I have been a disrespectful brat all day. I'll keep you posted! |
Katie_spades
Supreme Spanko
Username: Katie_spades
Post Number: 609
Registered: 11-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 21, 2006 - 11:23 pm: |
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ohhh you have to tell us about it!!!! We can't wait!!! I just got one earlier and am still sitting on ice, LOL... cant wait to hear about your sore bum.
Katie Spades: The Princess of Spanking
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Faye
New member
Username: Faye
Post Number: 15
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, June 22, 2006 - 03:29 pm: |
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It wasn't last night...might be tonight, I'm nervous! i think I need it though, its been a stressful day! I'll keep you all posted. |
Tplayer
Spanko
Username: Tplayer
Post Number: 94
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, June 22, 2006 - 06:13 pm: |
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He's torturing you Faye!! Good luck tonight.
It's all a matter of perspective
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Weasel
Spanko
Username: Weasel
Post Number: 66
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, June 22, 2006 - 06:29 pm: |
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Oh, I hope what you thought was a preview wasn't what he thought was the deed! Is he still promising that "you're gonna get it"?
We're all rootin' for you to get tossed down over his knee and get spanked the way you want!
Some day you'll spank me... er thank me for this!
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Faye
New member
Username: Faye
Post Number: 16
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, June 22, 2006 - 09:46 pm: |
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Yup, he is still threatening but for some reason life keeps getting in the way! No, he knows that was just a preveiw I'm sure! well, its still early and I have to get the kids to bed. Then we'll see what happens!!!! |
Pinkcheeks
Supreme Spanko
Username: Pinkcheeks
Post Number: 579
Registered: 12-2005
| | Posted on Friday, June 23, 2006 - 08:25 am: |
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Faye...has he been threatening you with a spanking for 15 days?? My, my, my..I would just throw myself over his knee 
Good luck ~~~ and yeah, isn't life a pain in the butt sometimes? lol~~
"Thought I WAS being a good girl...really I did!"
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Faye
New member
Username: Faye
Post Number: 17
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Friday, June 23, 2006 - 10:55 am: |
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Hi,
Yup, lol...well last week my monthly friend was here and that lasts 7 days, then I got some kind of stomach flu so that added to the time but ummmm...YES it finally happened last night! We are just starting out so he needs to improve on the whole punishment thing but it did hurt!! I don't like the wooden spoon, that thing actually bruised me!! He doesn't know that yet..I am going to try and avoid him until they are gone because I just KNOW that will freak him out and he won't want to do it again. It really wasn't THAT bad, I just bruise easily. That spoon does sting though. I think we need a better beginner implement. Thanks for listening guys! |
Pinkcheeks
Supreme Spanko
Username: Pinkcheeks
Post Number: 581
Registered: 12-2005
| | Posted on Friday, June 23, 2006 - 02:23 pm: |
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Hon, the best "beginning implement" is his hand. Hubby and I have been into spanking for the last 3 years or so, and I am hardly spanked with a wooden spoon - remember, implements made of wood are going to bruise! If he is a "vanilla" who is slowly coverting over to the spanking scene, one look at the bruises may send him running! I hope that's not the case, but a lot of men who have been taught to "never hit a woman" will freak when they see marks like that. I don't know how you are NOT going to show him - but when he does see them, you are going to have to explain the importance of a warm-up spanking (to avoid bruises). Do this in a tender, loving way - as to not scare him off
So, if I can put in my 2 cents here - I think a hand-spanking might be the way to go for now (heck, my hubby can give a hand spanking and I feel it for HOURS after) - then gradually introduce leather paddles into the scene 
good luck Faye...and you can always come here for help and advice...sometimes we're pretty good at it....LOL!! 
"Thought I WAS being a good girl...really I did!"
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Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 1025
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Friday, June 23, 2006 - 03:24 pm: |
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Pink has given you some great advice so I second what she's said.
I hope you take a chance to tell him how much you appreciate his efforts and praise him for a job well done. Or show him by doing something special for him. Positive reinforcement is always a good thing!  |
Faye
New member
Username: Faye
Post Number: 18
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Friday, June 23, 2006 - 03:43 pm: |
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Hi,
Thanks, we've agreed to stick to hand for now, lol. I got a little carried away and suggessted the damn thing! He won't see them, I am going out of town until Tuesday and tonight I'm just way too tired, I'm going straight to sleep. I already told him I haven't been feeling well and can't "do anything" tonight, which is the truth. I really don't want him to see them, it will scare him. He suggested a ping pong paddle, anybody ever use one of these? LOL, my thing is if it's a punishment spanking I think he should use something to make me not want it. I get too much pleasure from a hand spanking to take it seriously. Ah,we'll get this right eventually. Thanks guys! |
Pinkcheeks
Supreme Spanko
Username: Pinkcheeks
Post Number: 582
Registered: 12-2005
| | Posted on Friday, June 23, 2006 - 04:21 pm: |
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Faye...a ping-pong paddle was the first spanking implement hubby and I bought!! Again, (and Bethie brought up a great point about telling him how much you appreciate his efforts) - start with the hand...and move to the paddle.
I know you are anxious about a "punishment spanking" - but its more important that the two of you discuss and/or experiment slowly. I was very anxious at the beginning too
Believe me...once hubby gets the hang of this "spanking thing" - I am sure there will be PLENTY of implements that will set your heart-a-pounding!! **just check out a thread where everyone talks about the different kinds of things they were spanked with - You be surprised how "creative" a man can get
"Thought I WAS being a good girl...really I did!"
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Blistering_blonde
Advanced Spanko
Username: Blistering_blonde
Post Number: 271
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Friday, June 23, 2006 - 08:10 pm: |
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OH I LOVE THE PING PONG PADDLE .. its stingy but never bruises me ...and i bruise REALLY easy ,(hell you worried ..then get a leather cover on it you know the type the protective case ..then its even less stingy ...REAL good in play that way) .. but the p.p paddle I can take and NOT fall off his lap with over excessive twisting to get away .. nice warm glow ..but no purple
He asked what I needed , timidly gave it at first, now he just knows.
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