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Kendra
Advanced Spanko
Username: Kendra
Post Number: 129
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Monday, May 30, 2005 - 03:11 pm: | 
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From what I am understanding there is a tremendous difference between a true discipline spanking and a bad girl spanking. I understand the reasons for a discipline vs. bad girl, but what are the physical differences??
ex) From what I understand a discipline spanking is strictly discipline, a bad girl spanking still has room for adult play. Please by all means correct me if I'm wrong.
Thanx
Kryssi
"you must tie her down and spank her, spank her well and after you've spanked her, spank me.."
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Smartnnaughty
Spanko
Username: Smartnnaughty
Post Number: 68
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Monday, May 30, 2005 - 04:07 pm: |
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I'd be interested in understanding this distinction too.
Sassy Sassy Sassy
No one can be as Sassy as me!
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Fanny
Advanced Spanko
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 368
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Monday, May 30, 2005 - 05:18 pm: |
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I begin this by saying that again, this is only one way to look at the differences. I can only speak from my own experience. A BG spanking can be for any silly infraction. Acting like a bad girl can be fun and can rile my husband up a bit. An example would be forgetting to do something, purposely doing something you know will get attention, a smart-mouth comeback, etc. It is just a more intense play spanking. A BG spanking can also be part of role playing, "you be the doctor and I will be the naughty nurse". It generally leads to sex.
Discipline spanking to me is serious business. It can only be experienced in a relationship where there is real trust. It is accepting that one member of the partnership will ultimately take control when necessary. It takes a lot of trust for me to accept that my husband can sometimes know when I NEED help with self control. The spanking is not necessarily any worse than any other BG would be. Well, in our case, it would be longer with a lot of scolding. The reality of it is, I know I have done something that has really upset my husband, and that alone is what makes it different. The mood and tone of the spanking does not feel sexual. I know I have done something that I wouldn't have/shouldn't have had I been thinking more clearly. There is always the initial question on whether one member of a partnership has the right to punish the other. In reality, we all punish each other on a regular basis. My parents would go days without speaking a word to each other. I have a good friend who forces her husband to buy her something expensive when he does something that angers her. So where is the line drawn? That is an individual decision. As I have said in another post, we had been married for many, many years before discipline worked its way into our lives. I did something that was life threatening and yes, stupid. My husband got very upset with me, in a way he had never been before. He felt justified in expressing his mood in a way he knew would really get my attention. He is not a yeller he is a doer. We were both very emotional before, during and after. It is more of a cleansing experience that can leave you feeling drained and afterwards we are more likely to cuddle up together and sleep than want sex. In our marriage, discipline only is an issue when an infraction is life threatening or marriage threatening. (For instance if I were to go ahead and have a one nighter with a specific rock star I have been dying to "do" for a very long time! Okay, I would rather take the spanking than end up in divorce court.)
If you have any more specific quesions, I will answer the best I can.
"Queen of Innocence""
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Kendra
Advanced Spanko
Username: Kendra
Post Number: 134
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Monday, May 30, 2005 - 10:22 pm: |
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Thanx for the input Fanny, that does help alot, although I was thinking for the physical aspects. Is a discipline spanking harder, faster, longer (you mentioned that). Different impliment, specifically for that purpose? or what? Is there alot of cuddling afterwards, or is there a time-out? etc.
"you must tie her down and spank her, spank her well and after you've spanked her, spank me.."
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Fanny
Advanced Spanko
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 375
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Monday, May 30, 2005 - 10:40 pm: |
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In our case, the spanking usually isn't harder, as we don't like bruising, but it is longer and has on one occasion been broken up into two sessions. It was difficult getting through the day knowing that part 2 was coming that night. My husband will not use his hand for a discipline spanking as that is too intimate,so it is a paddle. As I mentioned it is long and emotionally intense, a time-out time isn't necessary, although the two parter was almost like a time for me to reflect. Afderwards I need to know that he has forgiven me and still loves me. I am really drained both physically and emotionally. Afterwards, he held me until I calmed down and then he placed me in the bed and tucked me in. The next morning life was back to normal and the infraction not mentioned again.
"Queen of Innocence""
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Katy_spankwish
New member
Username: Katy_spankwish
Post Number: 9
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, May 31, 2005 - 03:31 pm: |
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For me discipline spankings are usual a bit harder and the Tops/Dom's ATTITUDE is alot sterner. |
Beachley
Spanko
Username: Beachley
Post Number: 57
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 01, 2005 - 07:39 am: |
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In our situation also the discipline spanking is not necessarily harder as Mr. B would not hurt me too much anyhow. I will know I'm getting spanked and that we are not playing. But it is more in the nature of his attitude, what he says during the spanking and before the spanking.
I don't get many BG or Discipline spankings most of our spanking are playful and fun or mock discipline.
But when a Discipline spanking is needed, the spanking per se does not change, it is the atmospher and his attitude that is changed. It is not something either one of us likes to do that is for sure.
The Spice of Life is having my OWN WAY!! A spanking would be nice.
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Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 191
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 01, 2005 - 11:56 pm: |
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We do 3 different specific types of disciplinary spanking. The first is a "corrective" spanking, and can be for silly things as well as mildly naughty things. He may just use his hand or a mild implement, but the spankings arent severe.
A "BG" is for something much more serious...sort of a get-your-attention spanking. It is more severe with harder swats and maybe several implements used to get the message across. I am lectured and maybe made to count the swats. Definitely not a fun experience, although not bad emotionally.
The "punishment" spanking is for the most severe of infractions...endangering myself or others, or acting out of control. We have a specific paddle I call Sting, that resides in my room to remind me to behave. When I earn a punishment, I am told what to expect and how many swats I will get. The punishment spanking works more on my mind than any other way...I dread them, I hate putting him thru this as well and am always glad when their finally over. Because of this he rarely has to give me more than 6 swats, and those are never very hard...although at the time I think he's killing me. Afterwards there are lots of hugs, kisses and promises to never make the same mistake again.
I have only had 1 BG and 2 punishments so far, and I intend to keep it that way. As far as corrective spankings go, well.... 
wolfie loves Steve more than anything else in the whole world...even more than chocolate and lobster!
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Fanny
Advanced Spanko
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 409
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, June 02, 2005 - 06:50 am: |
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In summary then, we all seem to be in agreement that DD is more of a pyschological punishment. The mood and tone of the spanking is what makes the biggest difference. When we know that we earned correction, we dread it mostly because neither partner has a good time. I think that women usually come down on ourselves so easily that it doesn't take much to discipline us.
"Queen of Innocence""
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Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 192
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, June 02, 2005 - 12:31 pm: |
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Very true Fanny. I can play off and on all day, and take a serious amount of spanking most of the time. Usually I'm hollering, begging and giggling all at the same time. But tell me its a punishment and the tears are quick to fall.
I dont know about anyone else, but I actually prefer this type of punishment. It gets thru to me immediately, and I rarely make the same mistake again. Forgiveness on both our parts is immediate as well, and we can then go back to having fun, secure with having fixed that particular problem. 
wolfie loves Steve more than anything else in the whole world...even more than chocolate and lobster!
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Fanny
Advanced Spanko
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 415
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, June 02, 2005 - 12:37 pm: |
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Exactly, Wolfie.
I don't do well with the tension hanging in the air. Yelling and the silent treatment just drive me crazy. If you can get me to admit that I have done wrong, I am putty.
"Queen of Innocence""
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Beachley
Spanko
Username: Beachley
Post Number: 59
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, June 02, 2005 - 05:48 pm: |
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I rarely ever got into trouble even before we started our DD relationship. But the one time early on in our marriage when I really messed up and he did not talk to me because he was so angry it was terrible. If we could have corrected the problem with a spanking I would have agreed to it readily vs. going thru almost a week of the tension that existed. But at that time spanking was not part of our relationship.
In my opinion spanking makes life so much easier when trouble does arise, it can be dealt with, over and forgiven.
The Spice of Life is having my OWN WAY!! A spanking would be nice.
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