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Blulizrdboots
New member
Username: Blulizrdboots
Post Number: 8
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, June 07, 2005 - 02:33 am: | 
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I'm not sure about this or anything...but it's been bothering me, now that I'm on here I figure I might as well post it.
My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 and 1/2 years, and we've been trying to add spanking into our relationship. We've been that way for...maybe a year (not sure exsactly). Anyways, he's pretty much a converted vanilla...but over the time it's been a little bit better. Right now I just don't think he does it...right. That's not exsactly the wording I want....
~L~ |
Kennysspankee
New member
Username: Kennysspankee
Post Number: 25
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, June 07, 2005 - 03:18 am: |
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Blu, if you don't think he does it right then you must have an idea as to how to do it right. Have you tried coaching him? Type in "how to give a spanking" into your search, and there's a really informative site there that covers just about everything. Maybe look at it together and you could point out to him parts you like that you know he's missing. If you don't tell him, he's not going to know, which seems to be the case as a year has gone by and you still feel like something is missing. |
Beachley
Spanko
Username: Beachley
Post Number: 63
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, June 07, 2005 - 09:05 am: |
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When my hubby and I started spanking he was a vanilla (not anymore by a long shot) I wrote a few stories that gave him an idea of what I wanted. I think that is a good way as then you can get your ideas across.
Sometimes I have noted that vanillas don't want to be told how to spank. In their minds it's just over the knee and swat, swat, swat. By putting your thoughts on paper in a story form it does not seem that you are telling him how to do it. But they do seem to pick up on the content of the story and over time incorporate it into their spanking.
Hope this makes some sense.
The Spice of Life is having my OWN WAY!! A spanking would be nice.
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Blulizrdboots
New member
Username: Blulizrdboots
Post Number: 10
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, June 07, 2005 - 11:26 pm: |
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Thanks, that did help a little.
I've shown him a couple of my stories and asked/told him to check out sites online. But maybe I'll try your thoughts out.
thanks |
Bigfoot1408
New member
Username: Bigfoot1408
Post Number: 16
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 08, 2005 - 08:22 am: |
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two sites that have given me a lot of insight are castle realm and restraints and rewards.
what i sense missing in your relationship is the deep heart to heart discussion of what each of you want and are willing to give in this type of relationship... my thought is that your s/o is afraid of hurting you.....
i am in a new relationship where she wants spankings,, i love patting her butt but i am paranoid about hurting her. |
Blulizrdboots
New member
Username: Blulizrdboots
Post Number: 11
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 08, 2005 - 11:39 pm: |
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I've seen castle realm, but I'll check out the other one.
Perhaps a lot of this might be because we still live at home. (I leave home the 20th!) So that means we can't really use the realationship 24/7. That and maybe it's because I'm getting tired of him?
~Blu |
Rhapsody
New member
Username: Rhapsody
Post Number: 3
Registered: 06-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, June 09, 2005 - 10:21 pm: |
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Hmmmmm... it seems that before you talk to him, you might want to reconcile with yourself how you feel about him. Is it the spanking that's not quite right, or is it him? Remember, though, all relationships have periods where we feel less strongly about the other person than at other times, so the feeling that you may be tired of him may in fact be that simple.
Good luck whichever way this goes...
"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." ~ Maya Angelou
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