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Vixievamp
New member
Username: Vixievamp
Post Number: 13
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, August 30, 2006 - 10:35 pm: | 
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So I think that I want to be a switch. I like to submit to men and there is no way I could ever dominate a man, but I think I could dominate a woman. And I think I could really get into it. I wish I had a playmate that I could experiment with. It's something that I at least wanna try. And it wouldn't have to be anything sexual even, I mean obviously it would be turning me on, but I wouldn't have to do anything sexual. This is why being bisexual can really suck because you always crave affection from a member of both sexes but if you're in a committed relationship it's not likely you can feel both those affections. But I wouldn't trade being bi for the world cuz that's who I am and I'm proud of it. I just really wish I had a female playmate whom I could give loving and guiding discipline to. But my relationship is most important to me and I would never do anything to compromise it. |
Bailey
New member
Username: Bailey
Post Number: 38
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, August 31, 2006 - 01:08 pm: |
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This is one reason I'm happy that I'm poly. If my partner didn't understand and accept my need to have both men and women in my life, I don't think it would work. Of course, my partner also understands my need to have multiple men and multiple women, sooo...
Bailey
"She makes love just like a woman ... but she breaks just like a little girl."
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Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 1098
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, August 31, 2006 - 07:02 pm: |
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First of all, contrats to you two ladies for being so comfortable in your own skin. 
I've seen some lovely poly relationships that make everyone happy, but I've seen at least one that made one of the participants miserable at times. But that was because she wasn't told that was what she was entering into beforehand. As long as everyone gives their permission before it's entered into, it can be a very satisfying arrangement for all.
Vixie, have you talked to your partner about your feelings yet? Does anyone else involved in this type of arrangement have any advice? |
Vixievamp
New member
Username: Vixievamp
Post Number: 14
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, August 31, 2006 - 10:43 pm: |
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Well when I first started seeing him my ex best friend tells me that she wants to pursue a sexual relationship with me. Now I have been madly in love with this girl for years, really she used to be my everything. So I talked to him about it and he said it was okay but to just know that he had never done anything like that so he had no idea how it would affect our blossoming relationship. I decided that it wasn't worth the risks, or my heart getting broken by this indecisive girl. But now that our relationship is past the blossoming stage and into committed I don't think he would be so comfortable to let me dabble. And I can totally understand that. I can honestly say that I would not be comfortable if he wanted to have another partner. But I don't know. He's a great guy so I think if I met someone he would be willing to let me have some kind of relationship with her if it meant that much to me, but he says he'd have to meet her first. I'll have to talk to him about it because he is always encouraging me to tell him whatever is on my mind. |
Bailey
New member
Username: Bailey
Post Number: 39
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Friday, September 01, 2006 - 11:33 pm: |
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Bethie,
I think poly is all about the maturity of the people involved. People who struggle to mantain one relationship in a functional way should *not* try to open it up, but they tend to be the people who *want* to do so because they think it is a free license to cheat.
That said, plenty of perfectly mature and functional individuals choose not to be poly also. I think it's terrible when people enter into relationships like that without understanding the expectations of all involved. I think the worst I've seen are people who want to be "poly" because their partner is, but then devote themselves to convincing him or her to leave all the others and attach solely to one. I think that makes everyone miserable. As my Dominant says (and I'm sure he stole the quote from someone more worthy than either of us), "Don't teach pigs to sing. It's a waste of time and it annoys the pig."
It all comes down to how we are wired.
Bailey
"She makes love just like a woman ... but she breaks just like a little girl."
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Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 1104
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Saturday, September 02, 2006 - 04:05 am: |
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Bailey, I agree with you completely! And I really do think it's about how we're wired. Although some of us, like me, are wired with multiple connections.
Btw, that quote about pigs has been said to be everything from an old Irish proverb to a quote by Heinlein. It's also been attributed to Mark Twain. Okay, I know you weren't asking for a literature lesson so I'll stop now. |
Ma_vie_en_rose
Advanced Spanko
Username: Ma_vie_en_rose
Post Number: 199
Registered: 01-2006
| | Posted on Sunday, September 03, 2006 - 08:54 pm: |
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Vixie. You know, I completely agree with you. I'm fully for team sapphos now, but II understand the difference in submitting to and dominating men and women. I have been in Ds relationships with men and it's been a very clearly defined them dominant, me submissive angle, but.. with women it does seem to be a little easier to have a fluid relationship. I'm still very much submissive, but I could be dominant I think much more realistically.
Especially during certain parts of my lunar cycle if you catch my drift ;) Though I for one am far too monogamous by nature to ever dabble poly. |
Vixievamp
New member
Username: Vixievamp
Post Number: 16
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Monday, September 04, 2006 - 11:34 pm: |
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Well this weekend was interesting....The friend that I mentioned in my previous post is a stripper and my boyfriend and I and two of my friends went to see her performance on Saturday. It helped a little in fulfilling my needs when it comes to women. I sat at the stage while the girls rubbed their breasts in my face and groped and bit my own breasts. Finally my friend got up on stage and bent over in front of me to let me spank her (not supposed to touch strippers, but i had special permission). i spanked her about six times and then she spanked me a few. All the men at the club were happy about this unexpected show. lol. Well I kept asking my boyfriend if he was okay with all of it and he kept saying yes and for me to go have fun. So eventually he starts to get angry because we have been there for like 5 hours and he's really tired and wants to go home. So we go into town to get something to eat and don't say anything to each other and get home and go up to bed. Finally I ask him what's on his mind and he replies "When first faced with you being a bisexual it was just a concept to me and I was okay with it, but tonight when faced with the real thing, with them touching you, I realized that I wasn't okay with it" This coming from a man who has never shown the slightest hint of jealousy. I told him it was okay to feel like that, that he couldn't help how he felt, and that I was glad he was being honest with me. And he told me "No, it's not okay, this is who you are and it's not your fault, it's mine, it's my issue and I'm just gonna have to work on it because I knew coming into this that you were bisexual and that's who you are. I knew that eventually you would want to be with a woman" And I said that it was entirely up to him. But he said no it wasn't that it's who I am and it's his problem and he's just gonna have to work on it. I am flattered by his honesty and cannot believe how open minded and loving he is being. I've never felt so respected by a boyfriend. I am still in awe. So I don't know I guess we'll just have to see what the future holds. I still don't know if I could be with someone else though. |
Atomicpuppy
Spanko
Username: Atomicpuppy
Post Number: 99
Registered: 08-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, September 05, 2006 - 11:13 am: |
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Hi Vixie,your boyfriend sounds great and what he has said is amazing as a lot of guys would probably throw a wobbly(tantrum and sulked most likely lol)but he dealt with it superbly.
Though unless he will be comfortable with you being with another woman from time to time you will not feel comfortable either.Once your emotions are involved things start to get a bit more complicated.Like he said,thinking it is one thing doing/seeing it is another as it makes it a reality,not fantasy.
I don't think that it's just his issue though.It takes two to tango and talking about it should help both of you.Good luck with that. |
Spankedteacher
New member
Username: Spankedteacher
Post Number: 20
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Saturday, September 09, 2006 - 01:08 am: |
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I consider myself a switch. When I play things out in my head, I can see myself both submitting to a man and dominating both men and women. I do not consider myself to be bisexual, but like I said, the desire (or perceived ability) to dominate and/or spank both is there for me.
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Prissietl
New member
Username: Prissietl
Post Number: 35
Registered: 07-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, October 04, 2006 - 11:14 am: |
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Invite him in to watch or maybe evern video tape it.
My hubby and I do not live poly but we have had a couple of extra friends join us in the bed from time to time. (yes one at a time...no wild orgy's here)
He said the sexiest thing he had ever seen in his life was me kissing another woman.
(but i'm not bi, so there was no reason for him to feel uneasy.)
I guess what i'm trying to say is don't leave him out.
The last time we played with one of our friends i was 9 mon. pregnant so i played "director" and told them what to do, how to do it, i controlled everything, it was lots of fun.
He might enjoy it if he's included.
Once a princess always a princess
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Nicenick06
Advanced Spanko
Username: Nicenick06
Post Number: 144
Registered: 02-2006
| | Posted on Sunday, October 08, 2006 - 03:15 pm: |
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As a switch I agree with Spanked teracher.
Nick
PS nice name that.
Conjures all sorts of images! |
Nicenick06
Advanced Spanko
Username: Nicenick06
Post Number: 150
Registered: 02-2006
| | Posted on Sunday, October 15, 2006 - 08:26 am: |
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I meant 'spanked teacher' who I note has just written a story.
Nick |
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