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Buenaventura
Advanced Spanko
Username: Buenaventura
Post Number: 180
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Monday, October 02, 2006 - 02:44 pm: | 
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Well guys I can,t believe it after all this time I finally met an honest to goodness real spankee!!!I still have a hard time believing it.I got into a group called "nalgadas y azotes" and started going down their list of menbers looking for a woman from Guatemala or barring that from some country close to me.with 1100 some menbers it was mostly the States or Europe and quite a few from Mexico.when from out of the blue a woman from Guatemala 46 years old and a spankee.I thought with my luck if there was somebody she,d end up being a spanker.I sent her a mail and two days later she responded.We,ve written each other for a week in messenger and yesterday had our first meeting eye to eye.We hit it off really well.Now I,m getting nervous cause she wants punishment spanking with instruments.Which I,m very ready to use but I.ve never given a real punishment to a spankee in my life.They,ve always been vanillas or much more often erotic spankings.Now we,ve already discussed which toys(she,s had 4 other spankers that came to visit her freom other centalamerican countries)and she,s very happy with the prospect of having somebody here to give her what she needs.So now we,re building on all the reasons why she deserves a good spanking and I started to collect toy,s.I have a 12 inch long bathbrush that,s really criminal when I,ve used it on my hand and everybody else around.Even gave my son and a few of my friends a couple of swats to try it out and everybody says it,s really dynamite.I have some kitchen spoons and that kind of thing and she says she has a hairbrush that,s really good.Says what she really like is a doubled up belt(likes the swishing sound as it comes out of the loops.Now my question how do I know what,s to hard and how do I know when to stop?I,m very enthused and our date is for this coming saturday so please give me some imput.PLEASE!! |
Tammynx
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Tammynx
Post Number: 1258
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Monday, October 02, 2006 - 03:23 pm: |
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I'm very happy for you Buenaventura!!
I wish I had some advice for you as to how hard when it is enough. My husband just seems to know. But he knows me and my body language. It might take a few meetings for you to really get to know her and how hard and how long. Listen to her and take your que from her. Communication will be a HUGE assest. Thats the only way you can know for sure. Keep talking to her and listening to her.
Good Luck!! |
Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 1140
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Monday, October 02, 2006 - 04:08 pm: |
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 Congrats, Buenaventura! I'm glad you've found someone, that's awesome!
I suggest you two have a talk about safe words first and foremost. You can use the basic green, yellow, and red words as cues. "Green" means go, "yellow" signals you need to ease up, and "red" is for stop. Since you are new to each other and it will take time to learn her non-verbal cues, you might need some guidance in the beginning.
I know some bottoms don't like to have any control over their spankings, but since this is the first time, you don't want to go too far or not far enough. If you can't gauge how she's doing and want some feedback, you can always ask her periodically during the spanking if she's okay. I know that during a punishment spanking that may not sound like you're being strict enough, but since you haven't spanked her before it's better to be safe than sorry. Especially if she's like some of us who are very verbal during spankings.
Be careful though, if she starts "flying" or slips into sub space, she might not respond properly. That's another thing to look out for. I know when I'm in sub space that I have no way of judging how hard I'm being spanked. That's when Dan has to use his own judgement.
Remember, if you become uncomfortable with what's happening, you are the top and have the option of slowing down or stopping as well.
Have you discussed if she has had punishment spankings in the past and if there are any other rituals that she wants to include in your encounter? You know, like corner time, scolding, counting, etc.
I hope it all goes well and it's an enjoyable experience for both of you! |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 2757
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Monday, October 02, 2006 - 04:33 pm: |
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Great for you, Buenaventura. I suggest you start slowly and build your way up. Sometimes the spankee can literally go a bit numb and not immediately feel how hard the spanking has become. By taking breaks every now and then (corner time?) you may be able to judge how her demeanor changes. You might also have a set question with a binary answer. My husband will ask me if I have learned my lesson and unless I give him a strong "YES", he knows it is safe to continue. Anything negative like "possibly" or "maybe" lets him know the spanking is not finished.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Pinkcheeks
Supreme Spanko
Username: Pinkcheeks
Post Number: 885
Registered: 12-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, October 03, 2006 - 07:58 am: |
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I am so happy for you Buenaventura!! I think you have some excellent advice from Tammy, Bethie, and Fanny  . The key is communication - from a safe word, to implements, to starting slowly.
Hope its a wonderful experience for the two of you!!
"Do I have to be good ALL the time?"
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Zippo
Prime Spanko
Username: Zippo
Post Number: 1666
Registered: 09-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, October 03, 2006 - 11:51 am: |
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Congrats Buenaventura ! Hard to add to the great advice already given. Be sure to watch her body language also, as some are not the best communicators especially when they get the big rush of endorphins and start 'flying' as Bethie so rightly stated. I agree with the others and start slow, learn her tolerances and have fun. Remember to play safe. Hope you two have a great experence.
The Brat Tamer...changing brats attitudes one smack at a time
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Buenaventura
Advanced Spanko
Username: Buenaventura
Post Number: 181
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, October 03, 2006 - 02:31 pm: |
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Thanks a lot everybody.Think I,ve more or less got it.We,ve decided on a safe word(red and yellow)I assume no spankee keeps shouting green green green.Implements as many as we can bring.3 hours more or less with time outs for talking hugging etc.I,ll deffinitly let you,ll know afterwards. |
Pinkcheeks
Supreme Spanko
Username: Pinkcheeks
Post Number: 887
Registered: 12-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, October 03, 2006 - 04:03 pm: |
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3 hours?!?! 
Look forward to hearing ALL the details Buenaventura 
"Do I have to be good ALL the time?"
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Tammynx
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Tammynx
Post Number: 1261
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, October 03, 2006 - 05:47 pm: |
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WOW me too!! Can't wait!!
Good luck!! |
Buenaventura
Advanced Spanko
Username: Buenaventura
Post Number: 182
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, October 03, 2006 - 05:49 pm: |
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That,s what she says pink.I,ll be what ever she needs. |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 2763
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, October 03, 2006 - 06:27 pm: |
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I don't think 3 hours is too long for a first time. I would guess you would want to talk and get comfortable with each other first. I can't see myself meeting a man face to face for the first time and flying right into spanking.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Buenaventura
Advanced Spanko
Username: Buenaventura
Post Number: 183
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, October 03, 2006 - 08:33 pm: |
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We,ve already met Fanny and have been talking all day mostly about the spanking she,s going to recieve.She asked me how I would spank her and I told her in detail from beginning to end including corner time.(sounded like an expert old buenaventura did)and since she,s told me she,s never cried I advanced the theory that crying is emotional catharsis and that our goal should ideally be her crying.(that,s not set in concrete)The hugging and all the other good stuff is obviously important to her so I,ll be playing it by ear a lot of the time.I,m getting excited.Ha ha! |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 2764
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, October 03, 2006 - 08:54 pm: |
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Way to go Buenaventura, it sounds like you have pre-pre spanking anticiaption getting very exciting.
Sorry I didn't more carefully re-read your original post where you said you have already met.
I agree though, I would rather schedule more time than anticipated than be rushed.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Weasel
Advanced Spanko
Username: Weasel
Post Number: 166
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, October 05, 2006 - 03:47 pm: |
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sounds like life is good, buenaventura! Enjoy!
Some day you'll spank me... er thank me for this!
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Buenaventura
Advanced Spanko
Username: Buenaventura
Post Number: 187
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, October 05, 2006 - 08:25 pm: |
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thanks Weasel.Two more days if nothing happens to change things.A little nervous but confident. |
Tammynx
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Tammynx
Post Number: 1291
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, October 05, 2006 - 10:20 pm: |
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It will all be good Buenaventura!! |
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