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Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 1226
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Saturday, January 27, 2007 - 12:25 am: | 
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I'd like some feedback from you members about something I've been mulling over for some time.
Once upon a time, we had a cyber play area that went very wrong. It was set up as a place for some light hearted play between members but unluckily it quickly turned into a serious problem and we had to shut it down.
The problem was that the people who used that area only talked to each other, never joined in any discussion outside that area, didn't play nice with anyone outside their group, used the area as their own chat room, and pretty much just abused our good will and hospitality. The last straw came when we tried to moderate them and they refused to straighten up. It was a nightmare and took all of our energy just to moderate that one area. Not that any of us wanted to moderate it for all the reasons I mentioned earlier.
The reason I'm rehashing this sad chapter in our history is that I'd like a new area that would allow members to have fun with each other and get to know one another in a casual setting that didn't necessarily follow the usual topic and discussion format in the other areas.
Because the threads would always be there, people could post when they had time. The problem with the chat room seems to be that none of us are on the same schedule or in complimentary time zones. This might solve that problem. This doesn't mean I'm getting rid of the chat room though, so don't worry about that.
Also, I wouldn't want the new play area to degenerate into a glorified chat room. That's what happened in the old cyber play area. People would post things like "Hi, what are you doing?" and other useless comments that belonged more in chat than on the forum. The threads made no sense because they just deteriorated into nonsense after awhile. There's no reason to say "hi" in a thread...and certainly not over and over again. If you want to chat, we'll still have the chat room for that.
I would like an area where members could post a set up for a scenario and invite anyone who is willing to join them in for a friendly get-together. You could talk, play, share, tease, and flirt in a spanko way and have fun with your friends here on the board.
The problem with the last cyber area was that we had too many brats who were too bratty and alienated everyone to the point where they had chased everyone else off and they ended up having to spank each other and then began creating new accounts for ficticious tops they invented so they'd have someone to spank them. (Which broke the rules about creating multiple accounts for yourself, btw.) Then there were tops who ran around spanking everyone without so much as a "how do you do" and then would go over the top and make people uncomfortable.
Personally, I don't want any cyber spankings, the very idea makes me uncomfortable. I did that with Dan when we were just getting to know each other and were in the early stages of spanko flirting, but that was a one time deal. What I do enjoy is having fun with my spanko friends and I'd like to have a place where we can play and not have to worry about getting cyber spanked or bratted if we don't want it.
In other words, you'd have to get to know your fellow spankos and come to an understanding before engaging in that sort of play. It wouldn't strictly be a cyber play area where everyone came to engage in cyber spanking.
I think that's where we made our mistake with the last one. No one was getting to know each other, they were just running around spanking like crazy or bratting and being ugly to each other to get spanked and being manic about it. Now if you make friends with someone and decide to have a little cyber spanking fun, that'd be great, but it wouldn't have to be the only reason to be in that area.
For instance, if I start a thread and name it Bethie's Spanko Country Club, I'd expect people to come in and socialize like they would if we were really adults hanging out as friends. We could ask each other questions, get to know each other, discuss favorite music, maybe do a little cyber dancing, play a game or two, and just have a fun night out...and it could last for days instead of just one evening. Because it's my thread, cyber spanking won't be a part of it for me or the goal of the thread. I'd just enjoy getting to know my fellow Denizens a little better and at their own pace.
Maybe a cyber play area on a spanking forum that didn't necessarily have spanking in every thread doesn't make sense to some, but for us, it might be the way to go. People could join in without feeling the pressure to engage in cyber spanking but if there were members who wanted to set up a scenario for a little fun and didn't mind having an audience and were willing to abide by the rules, they could go for it.
I'd appreciate it if people would use a little imagination and come up with fun scenarios for people to join in on. You could set up a spanko resort, a spanko flea market where we could trade toys and ideas, a spanko deserted island, a harem, even start a spanko storyline and invite others to join in, whatever strikes your fancy as long as it abides by the rules.
The only thing that really scares me about this idea is that the bratting and other nonsense that went on before might try to creep in again, and I want to make it clear that it will not be tolerated. I let that slide before and that was my mistake, I won't make that same mistake again.
We're adults here and I expect everyone to act as such. I won't put up with the over the top bratting and topping that chased away more than one potential player in the past. Friendly teasing would be fine, but manic bratting and topping won't be.
I want people to feel comfortable posting in that area without having to worry that they'll get something they didn't ask for. A lot of us are in relationships and have no desire to play that way. But we still would like to engage in play that involved our fellow spankos where we could talk and act like spankos.
Of course, if someone asks "Whatcha going to do, spank me?" or "Are you looking for a spanking?" and it's reasonable for the way the conversation has been going, then that's bait and it's up to you to decide how to handle it. We're all adults here and I think if we play this right, it can be enjoyable for all of us.
So what do you all think? I'm not sure what I'm going to call it yet, but you can rest assured it won't be called the cyber play area. Been there, done that, and had to delete the whole stinking thing.  |
Rasenite
New member
Username: Rasenite
Post Number: 8
Registered: 01-2007
| | Posted on Saturday, January 27, 2007 - 03:20 pm: |
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I think you should go with what you feel is manageable after all it's the moderators that have the work. If people cannot play nicely then they should....leave and go somewhere else. I know i am new here but the regulars all seem quite sensible people.
Yes lady you know whats coming
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Blushingbride
Spanko
Username: Blushingbride
Post Number: 58
Registered: 10-2006
| | Posted on Saturday, January 27, 2007 - 04:20 pm: |
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I wasn't here when you had that area or it's problems but I can certainly see where it could become a problem for you and the rest ofhte mods to deal with. That said, I also think that it could be a lot of fun if handled with maturity and respect.
Speaking for myself, I would love to have the opportunity to get to know others here in more of a casual setting on the board. I've tried in the chat room, but only found anyone in there once. This type of area would make that much easier. But it's your board, and you get to be the one that decides the limits of what is on here. |
Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 1228
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Saturday, January 27, 2007 - 05:33 pm: |
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I forgot to mention something, as usual! 
I'm considering making this area a "members only" area, which means you'd have to log in to view or post in that area. There are pros and cons to both sides of that. It might make things more comfortable since the conversations won't be available to the public but then our lurkers who come here only to read might miss out on some of the fun here. Some of them have legitimate reasons for not wanting to log on so it's not just a matter of them not signing up for membership. But then we might get more members involved if they know the only people there are other members. I just can't decide. What do y'all think?  |
Buenaventura
Advanced Spanko
Username: Buenaventura
Post Number: 417
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Sunday, January 28, 2007 - 07:16 am: |
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Sounds like fun!! Not sure I understand all the rules but you can rein me in (as Fanny does once in a while ).Go for it!! |
Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 1232
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Sunday, January 28, 2007 - 02:24 pm: |
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Buena, those are a lot of rules aren't they? Let me try that again and not be so heavy-handed about it. 
Sorry about that, everyone, I think I got carried away trying to explain all the reasons the cyber play area didn't work out. I don't want anyone to think we're opening that area again - this will be a brand new area and nothing like the old cyber play area.
Okay, I guess the simple rules are: have fun but keep it respectful and act like adults. Those are the basic rules of the Den so hopefully it will carry over into the new area. I think with the members we have now that it shouldn't be a problem.
Unless Buena decides to let his inner brat out and then I'll leave that problem to my mods. I'm sure Fanny will get it under control in no time at all.
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Buenaventura
Advanced Spanko
Username: Buenaventura
Post Number: 418
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Sunday, January 28, 2007 - 03:20 pm: |
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 WHO ME????? |
Tammynx
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Tammynx
Post Number: 1667
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Sunday, January 28, 2007 - 06:54 pm: |
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YES you!! |
Ma_vie_en_rose
Advanced Spanko
Username: Ma_vie_en_rose
Post Number: 327
Registered: 01-2006
| | Posted on Monday, January 29, 2007 - 03:52 am: |
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I would think, even if it's not an issue of just not signing up for an account and having reasons to not log in, that people who aren't engaging in discourse in an area like that wouldn't neccessarily have a right to the private details which members would confide in one another. Kind of a quid pro quo, but also, a means of assuring that people can talk more openly knowing that a certain set of people would be seeing it. I think a members only area would work for that, I mean, chat works similarly where only members can log onto it, yes?
I'm not entirely sure how difficult it would be to moderate it though, remembering the problems with the previous cyber play area unless you limited the number of threads a person could start on the forum and perhaps made it so people had to be invited to join--it could be a matter of
Poster: [initial post]
new person: (Hi, can I join?)
Poster: (sure) -story continues-
sort of thing; that would at least cut down on members just jumping in and ruining pre-existing stories--that was so maddening at times ^^; I don't think I actually ever managed to complete a scene in that forum. (Not that it was conducive to hanging around with the people who took over every thread ^^; ). I mean, it wouldn't be new coding, just perhaps having to let either the thread's owner talk to the person, or if it's a chronic issue, the moderators dealing with it.
Sorry I went a bit long. My gemini takes over and I just talk and talk and talk |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 3049
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Monday, January 29, 2007 - 05:51 am: |
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I think this idea can work as long as the topics are kept to and we delete anyone who only posts in attempt to draw attention to themself and not contribute to the topic. The biggest problem in my opinion in the past were the posters who threw themselves in making no sense. I grew very weary of the "ME, ME, ME" sorts. Also tons of one and two word entries that needed to be waded through to get back on topic.
In addition, there is no question that I can keep anyone in line whenever it is necessary. 
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Tammynx
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Tammynx
Post Number: 1669
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Monday, January 29, 2007 - 09:38 am: |
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I agree with you Fanny. I think a new area can work as long as rules are followed. When they aren't if it is stopped right then and there I think things will run smoothly.
The old area was not NOT for me I couldn't follow half the threads if I had wanted to. The "bratting" was like nothing I have ever seen or care to see again.
We know what didn't work before and that is most of the battle. I think a new area will be fun! |
Dakota
New member
Username: Dakota
Post Number: 6
Registered: 12-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, January 30, 2007 - 05:09 am: |
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The only problem I have with the members only thing is that I am having problems logging in.. I can post and everything but it won't log me in. From the site.. I am not sure if it's something I'm doing wrong.. but I never get the "new" post icon or anything |
Speevak
New member
Username: Speevak
Post Number: 12
Registered: 09-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, January 30, 2007 - 08:48 am: |
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I have problems logging in too. I have no difficulty posting or sending messages, but my attempts to log in are never acknowledged. |
Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 1235
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, January 30, 2007 - 02:20 pm: |
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I think the problems you're experiencing have more to do with how your computer handles cookies than with the forum software, but occasionally when I've done some maintenance, you might get those problems, too. I also see false "New" icons more when I use certain scans or delete the cookies on my computer.
Are you logging in at the top of the page? Have you set the option in your profile to remember your username and password in a cookie?
Just to make sure you can access the new area, go to the chat room area and log in there. If you can access that area, you should have no problems with the new area as it will be the same thing.
Let me know if you have any problems with that and I'll try to figure out what's going on. |
Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 1237
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, January 30, 2007 - 05:13 pm: |
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Just so you all know, I started the new area, titled it "Our Spanko Rec Room" and started an intro thread.
If any of you aren't familiar with the term "rec room" it's short for recreation room. (It's a common phrase here in the US but not so much in other countries.) It's a place for informal entertaining and recreation and that's what we're aiming for. Go check it out!  |
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