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Kina_confused
New member
Username: Kina_confused
Post Number: 1
Registered: 04-2007
| | Posted on Wednesday, April 25, 2007 - 05:02 am: | 
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Hi, i am a 19 yr old college student and this is a little weird for me. i have never actually communicated with anyone else who enjoys spankings in a sexual way. at least none that i know of. For the longest time i was ashamed of myself for being turned on by spankings. I don't know why i just didn't think it was normal. I remember <edit> watching saturday morning cartoons waiting for one of the characters to be spanked. I would look up the word 'spank' in the dictionary just for fun. I didn't realise that it was a fetish until i got bored looking at playboy pictures online, and decided to google spankings. Some of the questions that i have is, does anyone know what causes spankings to be a turn on for somepeople, and is it more common that what I think? anything you guys can do to help me feel more comfortable with myself will be greatly appreciated. thanks.
(Message edited by fanny on April 25, 2007) |
Weasel
Advanced Spanko
Username: Weasel
Post Number: 266
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, April 25, 2007 - 12:08 pm: |
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Hi Kina, glad you found your way here. I can't answer the "why" some people like it, but I can agree that they do. Apparently the buttocks is a rather largish errogenous zone in some.
You're not alone, whether you like to "give" or "receive", there's tons more people out there like you that are turned on by either spanking someone or getting spanked by someone. As you read through the posts here I'm sure you'll find that there are also a variety of ways to enjoy it **in an ADULT manner**. The one thing you need to remember though is to make no references to underage anything, as it is the line drawn in the sand over which we wholeheartedly agree not to cross.
Realizing that at 19, most of your history would be in reference to "underage" activity, we hope you will understand and respect this limitation. However we are all glad to welcome a neo-spanko to the group and will try to honestly answer your questions.
Some day you'll spank me... er thank me for this!
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Kina_confused
New member
Username: Kina_confused
Post Number: 2
Registered: 04-2007
| | Posted on Wednesday, April 25, 2007 - 01:20 pm: |
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I understand that now, and I'm sorry about that. I didn't know. I'm really sorry. I understand why, and it was 5 in the morning I wasn't thinking. I'm really sorry. I'm just really confused and trying to understand what is going on with me. I thought giving information about my history would help people understand my situation more, and therfore help me in return. Once again I'm really sorry, and I hope I didn't offend anyone. |
Closetoedge
New member
Username: Closetoedge
Post Number: 13
Registered: 12-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, April 25, 2007 - 02:13 pm: |
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kinda:
If you were to ask all the members in this den if anyone looked up the word " spanking" in the dictionary or watched cartoon hoping some one would get a spanking you would see a lot of hands raised. You are DEFINATELY not alone, but at the same time it is not all that easy. In a way having the liking of spanking and related adult activites is like being gay in a way. If you ask non-spanking people called " vanillas" in this world they will think that you are weird or sick
or whatever. If you ask members in this den or other spankos, you will be welcomed and understood 100%. I would not worry why spanking works for people, just know that for some people it works and other it doesn't. I have an answer to all my non spanking friends that ask me why spanking works for me. I tell them that I can not tell them why it works, I just know it does. I also tell that person that when they can tell me why and how hugging and kissing etc works for them, I will be able to tell them why spanking works for me. I have yet to get a good responce from a " vanilla" person. If I can be of any further help, kinda, just PM me and I will see what I do to answer any question you have, |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 3192
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, April 25, 2007 - 05:08 pm: |
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Kina, don't be concerned about what is going on with you. Most of us do not discuss our lifestyles or spanking desires with the "outside world". That is why groups such as this one are here. We are a friendly bunch of people who share a mutual interest. We are no different than thousands of other groups who share ideas, desires and stories.
Spanking has been around since the beginning of time and the desire for it is much more prevalent than most of us realize. It is actually a pretty common desire of a lot of people on one level or another.
No need to get flustered or confused, just read all the posts you can and if you can't find an answer, ask the group. As long as the topic is about consentual, adult spanking, pretty much all is fair to discuss. If you have any concerns about what you can ask, please check with the site protocol.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Kina_confused
New member
Username: Kina_confused
Post Number: 3
Registered: 04-2007
| | Posted on Thursday, April 26, 2007 - 06:19 pm: |
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Thank you so much for everything you have all said, and making me feel welcome. It really helps to know that there are other people who enjoy spanking as much as i do. Closetoedge, why do we call non-spanking people "vanilla's"? |
Closetoedge
New member
Username: Closetoedge
Post Number: 14
Registered: 12-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, April 26, 2007 - 07:51 pm: |
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Kina:
I do not know exactly why they call people who don't like spanking " vanillas". My guess it has something to do with that they have more " plain" idea thoughts when it comes to sex and other related topics. They aren't any better or worse than we are, they just do not enjoy our spanking lifestyle. |
Buenaventura
Supreme Spanko
Username: Buenaventura
Post Number: 613
Registered: 04-2006
| | Posted on Friday, April 27, 2007 - 07:13 am: |
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Hi in one dictionary vanilla means "referring to atype of sex which is ordinary male/female without any variations or kinks" another says"a term used to describe normal relationships or to identify the normal side of a relationship" "vanilla having a lack of interesting flavor" another says"a term used to describe an optionwith no extra or special features"maybe the best comes from wikipedia"vanilla sex is a term that refers to what society considers to be standard or normal sex.Different cultures,subcultures and individuals have different ideas about what constitutes vanilla sex.Often it is interpreted as sex that does not involve such elements as BDSM kinks or fetish activities"Hope that covers it for you Kina. |
Rawhide
New member
Username: Rawhide
Post Number: 8
Registered: 04-2007
| | Posted on Friday, April 27, 2007 - 10:42 am: |
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Kina
I never knew what "Vanilla" meant until a couple of years ago from a guy. We were just discussing it and he and another guy spank each other but he told me that he is strictly: "Vanilla" which in his terms meant no other hanky panky such as oral sex. He said he was Bi-Curious which meant to him that nothing else goes on because he is married and just curious about his lifestyle. His wife is not interested in it so he went to men!
To me "Vanilla" means POWER over an individual. I get turned on when I spank a woman. I never knew why but then I figured it was a form of power over someone else. It may sound bizzare to you but my "X" wife was always into this power thing over me and when I got divorced I met a girl who said she was turned on by being spanked. I said I was willing to try anything new so we did it and I liked it and have been doing it ever since. I was totally turned on and of course so was she. Vanilla means to a lot of people that I have met in life that they are not into anything else like BDSM or any other kink. This was their preference and that was it, then great lovemaking afterwards. So don't feel sorry about it or apologize for it. If it turns you on, do it. You are not a freak! We may look at other peoples' fetishes and think: "What is wronng with them?". There isn't. It is just their thing!
I} had to make a comment on this subject after reading all of the postings. You are perfectly normal becausee it is your fantasy to be spanked. Enjoy it and don't let other people judge you for it. That is why this group is here. We want to express our feelings about this subject and I see the input is very productive and I hope it sets your mind at ease. Relax and enjoy!
Den} |
Tammynx
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Tammynx
Post Number: 1954
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Friday, April 27, 2007 - 01:22 pm: |
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Kina I think that at one point in time we have all felt at least somewhat like you feel.
I always looked up the word "spank" or "spanking" in the dictionary too. I also loved watching shows on tv that I knew at at least one episode of spanking.
I don't think it makes you strange or an outcast or anything close to thoes terms.
Everyone is different that is what makes us unique.
I have to say to Rawhide...I'm not sure where the vanilla and POWER refrence came from. I have NEVER heard the term Vanilla where it was used as a power word.
I have always known the term vanilla to be people NOT into this lifestyle. If they aren't into the lifestyle you have no power over them. |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 3194
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Friday, April 27, 2007 - 02:36 pm: |
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This is the first time I have ever heard the term vanilla used in the way Rawhide is using it. I guess it is all in the manner of interpretation, but vanilla in most senses refers to any flavor (whether it is food or people that is the most bland) I have never heard anyone say that vanilla is a powerful flavor.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Rawhide
New member
Username: Rawhide
Post Number: 9
Registered: 04-2007
| | Posted on Friday, April 27, 2007 - 08:17 pm: |
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Fanny,
I may have mis-interpreted the word Vanilla with Power. They connect with me because it is kind of a "kink" in a way. Just like everything else is in this world. Some people like a certain kink and we might think they are odd but who are we to judge? On the other hand I don't know how to completely explain Vanilla. It could be explained as a conservative word like some people are, strictly into straight sex and nothingg else. That is how I see it.
Back to the main subject Kina should not feel bad about being turned on by being spanked. It is a turn on! So simply enjoy it and don't let other people judge you because you happen to like it. We all like it. That is why we are here. But we all have our own ways we like to have it done or do it to others. Just like all of the other groups out there. They have their }forums and posts and describe what they like and don't like.
That is all I can say on this. Have a SPANKING good time! DEN |
Kina_confused
New member
Username: Kina_confused
Post Number: 4
Registered: 04-2007
| | Posted on Saturday, April 28, 2007 - 01:36 am: |
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actually rawhide, i'm a spanker. Never thought about being the spankee, but i might enjoy it. But for the most part i'm strictly a spanker. Even though I've never done it. Thank you for letting me know that it's not something i should be ashamed of. And thank you to all who have explained what vanilla means. |
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