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Babyj4
New member
Username: Babyj4
Post Number: 5
Registered: 09-2005
| | Posted on Sunday, September 11, 2005 - 10:40 pm: | 
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why is it that some of you enjoy spanking as for play, but are afraid to dish it out as a punishment? |
Plezurscry
New member
Username: Plezurscry
Post Number: 11
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Monday, September 12, 2005 - 06:20 pm: |
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excellent question
would love to hear some honest responses
sometimes i think its because they fear hurting us
is there more to it than that? |
Beachley
Advanced Spanko
Username: Beachley
Post Number: 134
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Monday, September 12, 2005 - 08:06 pm: |
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I am not a guy, but I can tell you about Mr. B my hubby who does not post. He did not want to spank at all at first because he was afraid he would hurt me.
Now that word hurt is OK as it is part of spanking. Now the hurt word is injure. He does not want to injure me. He also now realizes that a well placed spanking even in punishment may hurt but it will not injure.
So I guess in his opinion it is the level of force used that makes the difference between hurt and injure. He is OK with the hurt now.
If any of that makes any sense.
The Spice of Life is having my OWN WAY!! A spanking would be nice.
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Babyj4
New member
Username: Babyj4
Post Number: 20
Registered: 09-2005
| | Posted on Monday, September 12, 2005 - 08:25 pm: |
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beachley, I see what your saying. How did he come to that realization?
Babyj- worlds cutest little brat!
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He_who_is_himself
New member
Username: He_who_is_himself
Post Number: 1
Registered: 09-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, September 14, 2005 - 10:17 pm: |
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I would say it's because I don't want to spank anyone who doesn't want to be spanked. Also kind of the reason why I don't like those videos where the bottom is screaming and kicking and the such, but like the ones where the bottom looks like she is enjoying it. |
Babyj4
New member
Username: Babyj4
Post Number: 42
Registered: 09-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, September 14, 2005 - 11:38 pm: |
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He_who_is_himself, the question I ment was about those who want spanking as dicipline, as well as pleasure, and have spouces who only like pleasure. but I agree about not doing it unless it is wanted.
Babyj- worlds cutest little brat!
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 1454
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, September 15, 2005 - 09:09 am: |
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This is a difficult situation to initially deal with. It is mind set issue. My husband and I were into pleasurable spankings way before we crossed into discipline. It isn't something to be taken lightly, and you need to understand that for it to work there is a mutual consent already in place. Woman in general carry a lot on their shoulders, we are not the weaker gender. There are times when just being able to relinquish to someone else is the best thing one can do for her own pysche. Especially when it comes to meeting her own needs, most woman do not give themselves permission to do so. Having someone step in and just take over for a while is often the most loving thing someone can do for another.
Discipline spankings are not usually any "worse" than a pleasurable one, again, it is the mind set. It is mostly an emotional release. It only seems worse because you (either secretly or out loud) know you need someone to take charge at that moment. You need to have complete trust in that person to take you to an emotional place to release, with knowing they understand why it is happening. It is kind of similar to being ill, most woman just keep on pushing through, ignoring the inner need to be taken care of. But don't we all crave the idea that someone cares and loves you enough to meet your needs?
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Babyj4
New member
Username: Babyj4
Post Number: 43
Registered: 09-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, September 15, 2005 - 02:04 pm: |
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Fanny, you are so right, and it is hard to explain it to my vanilla, so I get what I can when I can. I hope it changes soon, my tension and emotions are really over welming at times, and that is when I tend to do things I shouldn't. I realy need him to be there to bring be back to reality, but he is having a hard time decideing what he wants.
Babyj- worlds cutest little brat!
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 1456
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, September 15, 2005 - 08:00 pm: |
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Yes, it is hard to explain to someone who doesn't have the same mind set as you. It just doesn't click with them. If someone is truly a vanilla, they may go along with you, but I don't think they will ever get the same satisfaction out of it. As an example, I personally find golf boring, I have no interest. I might golf with someone if they asked me to, but I don't think I would ever get into it as many people do.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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