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Redhinney
Advanced Spanko
Username: Redhinney
Post Number: 256
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, February 21, 2006 - 08:59 pm: | 
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The question I asked about being a femal got me thinking about how others view me. I don't mean Bill, my brothers or my close friends we all know that they think I'm a girly girl but what do others see me as. so I asked my admin assitant what she told people who ask her to explain me. At first she gave me physical description and that I am a terrible speller. OK I gave her that but what does she tell people about me. Her answer some what shocked me, she tells them :I am a tough women who doesn't know the word no or I can't, I follow the rules but know that some rules are made to be broken, I can handle many things at the same times and make it look like a walk in the park (if she only knew)People who shout and scream don't scare me and I usually get my way with kindness rather than pushing, I have a take no prionser mode if needed and I can tough as nails to anyone who hurts someone I love. I know what I want and I make sure I get it. I am a person of principles and I expect the same of everyone (she viewed this as a fault becasue it leaves me open for disappointment) I command respect but I give it back freely. and the finally thing she added one tough broad.
So with that description I think I will now take over the world. Seriously, it got me thinking if people see me as that in my working world than they are in for one big surprise if they would ever have a peek into my home life. Bill and I have been exteremly good about keeper our private life private. Now think carefully what would the people who surround you think about the relationship you are either in or may have been in the past would they think youa re the sub or the dom? Would they thin you are the top or the bottom? the spankee or the spanker?
By the way I did ask her about Bill and her answer was that everyone is sure that when we are together "doing it" (her words) that there are some sparks flying. so nice to think that my staff is spending tie worried about my sex life.
Love can't always be seen or heard but will always be felt with your heart
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Jasmine_1958
New member
Username: Jasmine_1958
Post Number: 36
Registered: 02-2006
| | Posted on Tuesday, February 21, 2006 - 10:25 pm: |
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I've talked to others about our situation. We are both top management in the same corporation. He treats me like "the boss". He tells everyone that they really don't want to "piss off his wife". We have the world fooled including our children. They are constantly telling me to make him straighten up, or you need to train your husband, etc. If they only knew! I think he really gets a kick out of it. The only problem is it's hard not to fall into the role. I have to be careful, or my butt is in danger when I get home. It's also hard to make the transition everyday, from dominant executive to home submissive. I always try to go home an hour or so before him, to get my mind in the right place. Otherwise, my butt will be cussing me later. |
Poofette
Spanko
Username: Poofette
Post Number: 52
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, February 22, 2006 - 02:10 am: |
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Redhinney,
Those closest to me in my home life have no idea of my quirks. At home, I'm a pleaser by nature. If pushed most of those closest to me would think I'm a "sub" although they would probably say neither would fit me well. At work it is another story entirely. My job demands that I take charge. It's essential to my success there to be the type that won't back down or take no for an answer. My co-workers would scoff at the thought of me allowing anyone to take charge. They would probably guess me to be a "dom" if asked. Which is the real me? Both. Two sides of the same coin as the old adage says. Both roles are as comfortable to me as a pair of old slippers. I don't find it difficult to slip into either role in either place if needed probably because they're both equally me and aren't really roles at all. Like almost everyone else here, I prefer to keep sexually submissive nature private and none but my partner know about it. And all of you, of course.  |
Redhinney
Advanced Spanko
Username: Redhinney
Post Number: 257
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, February 22, 2006 - 07:45 am: |
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Jasmine
Bill and I work together as well but fromt e very begining it was establish that I am the boss at work and two that once home whatever happened at work stays at work. I never worry if I tell him no at work that I will be OTK for it at home.
Love can't always be seen or heard but will always be felt with your heart
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Jasmine_1958
New member
Username: Jasmine_1958
Post Number: 37
Registered: 02-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, February 22, 2006 - 08:43 am: |
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Red,
Work stays at work in our home also. It's the social settings with co-workers, friends or whoever that gets me in trouble. He likes them to think I wear the pants in the relationship so he makes comments in those situations. It's hard sometimes not to run with it. Also, while we are at work, we do alot of personal planning and visiting. Those situations can also get me in trouble. For example, yesterday he came in my office and we were talking about our upcoming vacation to Maui. He got on my computer to show me the weather report. About that time 3 other things came at me. I told him "to get back to work, I'm busy". I don't usually snap at him, but it happened. I wasn't in trouble, just got the "don't push it look". |
Pinkcheeks
Spanko
Username: Pinkcheeks
Post Number: 125
Registered: 12-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, February 22, 2006 - 08:50 am: |
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Like Poofette, my husband and I like to keep our lifestyle our own. Although he may tease me in front of close friends or family members about spanking, they have no clue what goes on at home - and we like it that way. My career (personal trainer) puts me in a control position and I am doling out commands to my clients most of the day (for their own fitness goals of course!), but at home I am very comfortable with "R" being the HOH. We are an extremely close and loving couple, and have been told that by strangers when we are out somewhere! I think that is because of the benefits of DD - we KNOW how it has changed the dynamics of our marriage. 
"Thought I WAS being a good girl...really I did!"
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Ma_vie_en_rose
Spanko
Username: Ma_vie_en_rose
Post Number: 65
Registered: 01-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, February 22, 2006 - 01:08 pm: |
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I actually had a friend laugh the other day saying he completely saw me as a dom in my last relationship, but then, he never met the boy. ^_^; I know when I left Josh, people started telling me how much I had changed when I was with him, to be more docile, restrained, my submission was very apparent. x.x
my only D/s relationship to date, however, was not a healthy one, so perhaps I speak as a minority. ^^;.
I have noticed in my current relationship that I very much am ambitious, proud, and rational, in control as I would not otherwise be.  but the power dynamic on that one is still to be decided if it exists at all. |
Katie_spades
Advanced Spanko
Username: Katie_spades
Post Number: 432
Registered: 11-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, February 22, 2006 - 10:50 pm: |
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It's so funny because in my life, I am always in command of everything: school, our house, offers, and anything else I can think of. I have always been a dominant force and leaders of clubs both in highschool and now in college and am planning on going to lawschool and I have no doubt that I'll be a bulldog in the courtroom as I plan to go into criminal defense, yet in my spanko life, I want nothing more than to be the spankee and to be punished when I have been naughty.
I'm sorry, but not as sorry as I'm gonna be.
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Jasmine_1958
New member
Username: Jasmine_1958
Post Number: 41
Registered: 02-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, February 23, 2006 - 09:39 am: |
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Doesn't it seem amazing that there are so many dominate people like us in our lives outside the home? I thought I was a bit strange wanting this TIH at home until I've listened to all of you. Thanks! |
Ma_vie_en_rose
Spanko
Username: Ma_vie_en_rose
Post Number: 87
Registered: 01-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, February 23, 2006 - 10:26 am: |
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Well, I guess it doesn't really have to be explained, but when you're spending all your time on top of everything professionally or academically or whatever, it's sometimes nice just to sit back and let someone else dictate things when you're home and just relaxing. |
Katie_spades
Advanced Spanko
Username: Katie_spades
Post Number: 443
Registered: 11-2005
| | Posted on Friday, February 24, 2006 - 02:20 am: |
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so true ma vie
I'm sorry, but not as sorry as I'm gonna be.
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