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Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 1397
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, March 14, 2006 - 11:04 pm: | 
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Gentlemen, if I could have your attention for a moment? I have a question here, that I know many of us females would like answers to. What is it about spanking that turns men on?
What kind of scenarios do men like? Do most role play, or simply do the scolding/stern voice bit? And what kind of responses do they like most, submissive and obediant, or bratty? Do most men like OTK, or different positions?
Is it the feeling of power and dominance that makes a spanking fulfilling for the male partner? Does he like thinking that he's "helping" her by correcting bad behavior? Does he enjoy her bratting him, or just put up with it? Why do some men put a lot of time and effort into learning how to spank well and do all the rest, and some just figure that if she's sore afterwards they've done their job?
I really would like to know guys, it's not just idle curiosity. I know why we women like it, and get so turned on...but I really want a man's perspective here. Please help us to understand you better, and not take so for granted that your having as much fun as we are! 
If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you.
Grow old with me, the best is yet to be.
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Fireman_chris
Spanko
Username: Fireman_chris
Post Number: 51
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, March 15, 2006 - 12:16 am: |
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Personally, I'm not big into discipline. My wife and I do engage in a bit of it, but its more playful in nature. Strangely enough, when I get really upset by something, spanking is the last thing I think about and we end up acting more like a vanilla couple would. My wife pretty much knows that if I'm spanking her for "punishment", I'm not really upset and am just looking for an "excuse" to spank her. :D Like I need an excuse.
I can scold with the best of them, but again, it tends to be in a more teasing fashion, and is often more of a precursor to the spanking itself.
I'm not particularly fond of bratting in general. Some mild, playful bratting is fun, but in the vein above, if its enough to annoy me, my reaction is not to spank.
As far as what I do like, simple, playful spankings are my favorite. I've always been attracted to the female derriere, even before I knew I was interested in spanking the female derriere. Spanking is a great excuse for touching, rubbing and generally having fun with a willing backside. Plus, I also enjoy the visual stimulus of her bottom reacting to the spanking (the movement, the coloring, etc.).
I don't mind some struggling/fighting, and it can be something of a turn-on (I guess that's the dominance part), but submissive has its advantages too, as does the idea of someone willing and eager to get over my lap.
I've done some role-playing and had mixed experiences with it. It can be fun from time to time, but sometimes, it almost feels like more work than its worth (depending on how involved the scene gets).
As you slide down the banisters of life
may the splinters never point the wrong way.
Old Irish Proverb
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Apatheticdream
New member
Username: Apatheticdream
Post Number: 14
Registered: 03-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, March 15, 2006 - 12:23 am: |
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Well, I guess I'll take the first crack at this one, from 2 different perspectives, seeing as I consider myself a switch.
Top Perspective -
A - I like booty. I have been known to randomly spout in my best pirate voice "YEAAARGH! THERE BE BOOTY HERE!" (ok, so I only do that in company of friends) Point is, my #1 physical feature in a woman is a shapely behind. See Sir Mix-A-Lots "Baby Got Back" for reference.
B - In deference to point A, there is no better way to admire a behind than in the positions that are required to smack it repeatedly. 
C - In a top role, I personally dont need any elaborate scenarios. I like booty and I like smacking said aforementioned booty. How I get there is negligible at best, although schoolgirl outfits are a good start. Little remarks like, "What are you gonna do, SPANK ME?!" are insta turn ons.
D - As for responses from the spanking, I want to know that the spanking is turning them on. Writhing, Moaning, Etc.
E - For me in a top role, it really isnt topping in the true sense. I just happen to be doing the swatting. In that role, I dont view myself as dominant or controlling. I am comfortable enough in my daily life and the control I have there to not need it in the bedroom. (hence one of the reasons I am 90% spankee) Its not about dominance, its about spanking (for me)
From the bottom -
A - Turn ons while being spanked are from 2 perspectives. One being foreplay spanking and the other being stress relief spanking. Foreplay spankings are a turn on because I like the feeling of the spanking, I like being controlled, and a naked me over my gf's naked lap is just heaven. Stress relief spankings are a turn on in ways that have nothing to do with the spanking...its because of the closeness I feel afterwards because of her taking care of this "need" of mine. (Case in point, I needed a stress relief spanking this past weekend, went home from caretaking and asked for it. I got a 1.5 hour spanking that progressed very well until by the end I almost allowed myself to break down. I didnt allow myself to get there, for whatever reason, but the after-spanking-sex was absolutely incredible. It had nothing to do with the spanking turning me on, it had to do with how much I loved J. for doing that for me. Hell, I am 5 days out and still bruised. I'm not a painslut by any stretch, so short of considering endorphin rush, that level of spanking wasnt a turn on)
B - As for scenarios, anything that puts J. in control. For any familiar with the book "The Mistress Manual" (not a bad read, just take it as all howto's. Use what you can discard/file the rest away) it breaks down the 5 most common archetypes of male femdom fantasies. I ended up with the "Governess" archetype applying to me about 95%. Stern but not cold. Dominating but not humiliating. Detached enough to give the spanking I need but not so much as to not care for me afterwards. J. in a business suit is deadly.
C - My preferred responses from her while I am being spanked is one that is willing to push me. Acknowledge my pain, sort out whether I can go further or not. I would have never imagined taking the spanking I did friday 2 years ago. Also, knowing that spanking me is turning her on is wonderful. Certain physiological responses in her let me know that.
As for the people who figure it out vs he's sore afterwards question...J. lies somewhere in between. She hasnt done the research, except what I have asked her to read, but she has learned me. She can tell you when I am reaching my limit what my body does. (main signal being sweat on the lower back) She can tell when she is moving too fast through the progression if the spanking. I think it depends on the person. If you plan to play publicly/with others, then you have to learn to spank well. If you plan to play with one partner, you only have to learn to spank them well.
Hope this helped. I know I rambled a bit, so feel free to ask me pointed questions and I will answer as best I can.
N.
...I catch a brief reflection of what (I) could and might have been...
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Reader_girl
Spanko
Username: Reader_girl
Post Number: 92
Registered: 07-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, March 15, 2006 - 06:11 am: |
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N. - "I like booty." 
Is there anyone here who doesn't agree with that statement? 
Thanks for the well explained insights. You are very articulate.
Reader Girl
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Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 1399
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, March 15, 2006 - 10:31 am: |
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Thank you guys, I really appreciate your comments and insight. 
If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you.
Grow old with me, the best is yet to be.
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