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Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 469
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 02, 2005 - 11:42 am: | 
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Everyone on this forum have big hearts. I can see it in the postings. So when one of us have a need to unload or vent or even have a pity party...we can do it here and know we will not be judged.
So here is my bad day feelings...
I'm getting depressed again. I don't like Christmas anymore. It's not so much the fact that I can't buy presents, it's cos I won't have family around me.
I made my choice to leave the states and live with my new husband in England and I don't regret it for one minute. I don't regret divorcing my kids dad but they all took his side and I'm the crazy mom that needs put in a looney bin. You would think that growing up in that house and knowing everything that went on, they would have understood why I left. But no. I never hear from them, no letters, emails...nothing. No pics of the grandkids. I have one grandson nearly 2 years old and I've never seen a picture of him. I tried to be a good mom. I thought I was. I did all the mom things. Made sure they ate all the right food, made sure they got to school on time, made sure they wore their seatbelts. I did the girl scout leader thing and did the overnights at the campground even tho I HATE camping!! Stood in the cold and rain to help sell cookies. Sat up all night with them when they were sick. Stood inbetween them and the ex when he was on a rampage and took the brunt so they wouldn't be harmed. Sold my treasured pink Harley so one would have the prom dress she dreamed of. Worked 3 jobs and overtime so another one would have the wedding dress she dreamed of and the wedding she wanted. Fought tooth and nail with social workers over my youngest who is bipolar and they wanted to take her away. They took her for awhile but by GOD I got her back!
I lost my oldest brother in Viet Nam...my only sister shot herself in the head...one brother I'm ashamed to claim is in prison and I hope he rots there...my youngest brother is a good person tho...has a sweet wife..bless them.
I have good friends here. I love them and I know they love me cos they say so all the time. They tell me I'm a good person. My hubby says I'm a good person with a kind heart. So why can't my daughters love me?
I'm feeling sorry for myself. I'm in good enough health and I'm not cold or hungry or alone, I just miss them and wish they missed me too.
No one needs to respond to this if you don't want to, it's ok...I just wanted to put my feelings into words and put them someplace.
Thanks for taking the time to read my post.
Once I thought I was wrong but I was mistaken
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 1811
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 02, 2005 - 11:56 am: |
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My heart feels for you Shylah. With some hope maybe your daughters will come around and see what they are missing without you. Sometimes it takes a while and unfortunately sometimes it never happens. I did everything I could do trying to get my father to love me and he never did. My life goes on, but the pain will always be a part of my soul. We can't control what others feel, do or say. My wish for you this Christmas is to find some peace of mind and soul.
Remember someone is always listening to you, some are just better able to express it.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 470
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 02, 2005 - 12:24 pm: |
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Thanks Fanny. Like I said...bad day feelings pouring out.
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Sdhrts
Junior Spanko
Username: Sdhrts
Post Number: 81
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 02, 2005 - 12:45 pm: |
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Shylah, I'm going through such a similiar situation now. I'm making a supioior effort to have a little Christmas spirit and will decorate my Yucca tree tonight(only a spanko would). Relocation is in my plans, but I'm not telling friends or family till I decide what's best for me and Tina. Her native land sounds better to me all the time. I'm an hvac tech with experience and licenses. My bro just had one of his friends put a boiler in for him as a side job. My bro inlaw is a contractor and I'm out of work scraping up dimes and nickles. So,I identify and sympathize. I'm off to deliver Chineese food to make ends meet. It hasn't been to bad so far either, but no health insurance. My new friends here have compassion and understanding-wish I could get a little bit of that from my own family and so called friends?
Love you all,
Steve sdhrts
Is IT Better To Give Than To Recieve?
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Sdhrts
Junior Spanko
Username: Sdhrts
Post Number: 82
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 02, 2005 - 12:50 pm: |
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My exwife burnt every bridge to my youngest son, I haven't seen him in 11 years, nor has my family or his God parants. Christmas is extra tough for me. Last time I saw him open presants under a tree he was 5. My oldest only returns calls I initiate, never visits and lives 10 minutes away.I've decided to live my own life. Tina and her darling daughter are my new concerns. I still hurts though. Bless you Shylah, remember you arn't alone
Is IT Better To Give Than To Recieve?
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Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 472
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 02, 2005 - 01:02 pm: |
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I am going to make an effort to have some Christmas spirit. I'll put up my little Charlie Brown tree and will even sing along to the corny carols and will try my damndest to put some heart into it. 
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 809
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 02, 2005 - 06:53 pm: |
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Do the best you can Shylah and Sdhrts, I'm sure every one of us has some heartbreak to share. It's always more difficult at christmas when we would like to have the perfect, traditional holiday. I'm not looking forward to being all alone for the first time ever...I like big noisy gatherings with lots of laughter and fun. If Im lucky my only brother will show up christmas day to spend a couple of hours with me. 
Ok, enough of that. Here's another way I would like to spend the holiday...with a warm bottom!
wolfie loves Steve more than anything else in the whole world...even more than chocolate and lobster!
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy.
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Tammynx
Spanko
Username: Tammynx
Post Number: 171
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Saturday, December 03, 2005 - 06:31 pm: |
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My heat goes out to all of you!! I won't be with my middle two kids...or the rest of my family. My husbands family has taken me in and my oldest and youngest kids will be with me.
I know it is hard Shylah...the first year I was with my husband I had only him...NO family and I cried.
I'll be thinking of you all...and hoping that you will be happy this Holiday Season.
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Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 474
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Saturday, December 03, 2005 - 06:54 pm: |
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I'm feeling better today. I get bouts of pity party feelings and just felt the need to pour it out. I think it's what helped me feel better. I'm not able to buy presents for my friends so I got out the old sewing machine and looked thru my material and am making an outfit for the 13 year old who is into goth lately...lol...their son is into Manchester United so I'm thinking of what I can do for him...I plan to crochet something for my bestest friend cos she is special to me and I want to make something really nice for her. For her hubby, I'm gona make him a woodworking apron cos he likes to work with wood and needs something to put his bits in...did I say bits?? 
I know I won't be alone cos of the friends and I know it should be a time to be thankful for what you have...not for what you don't have...positive thinking.
I'm working on it...I really am.
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 475
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Saturday, December 03, 2005 - 06:58 pm: |
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oh and by the way Wolfie...if you can make it to the UK...you come spend the holidays with me...we'll give the Doms grief and drink pepsi till we puke!! And I know some cool "toy" shops to go to. (I'm so bad)
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 811
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Sunday, December 04, 2005 - 09:28 am: |
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Shylah, I wish with all my heart I could be there for christmas! I'd love to join you in be-deviling the Tops...and as a coke drinker I have never puked from it (although Pepsi might manage it). LOL
Ummmmm, I love toy shops! Unfortunately, I'm already in trouble for talking Ann into going to one when I was visiting 3 weeks ago...and now Im not sure if its safe to go "exploring" anymore! 
But when I think of all the fun we could have, 2 native americans on the loose in England....I think it would be worth it! 
wolfie loves Steve more than anything else in the whole world...even more than chocolate and lobster!
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy.
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Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 483
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Monday, December 05, 2005 - 04:54 pm: |
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Of course it would be worth it! You would have me there to coach you. (evil grin)
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 816
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Monday, December 05, 2005 - 09:14 pm: |
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Coach me? I dont think I need any help getting into trouble, it always seems to find me.
Ive always wanted to moon the palace guards....think we could manage that?
wolfie loves Steve more than anything else in the whole world...even more than chocolate and lobster!
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy.
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Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 486
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, December 06, 2005 - 09:08 am: |
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Sure we could but would rather wait till warmer weather...LOL
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Hunny
Spanko
Username: Hunny
Post Number: 857
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, December 06, 2005 - 05:46 pm: |
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You two are crazy girls! |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 1814
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 07, 2005 - 05:48 am: |
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Shylah, Everytime I am in the U.K. the forecast is party sunny, chance of rain. When you girls get a shopping trip planned, count me in, rain or shine!!!
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Katy_spankwish
New member
Username: Katy_spankwish
Post Number: 8
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 07, 2005 - 10:37 am: |
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"Unfortunately, I'm already in trouble for talking Ann into going to one when I was visiting 3 weeks ago...and now Im not sure if its safe to go "exploring" anymore! "
Now why would you be introuble for that. Shoot Mr. B took her TWO himself in Toronto.
BTW it's Christmas time and some of the stores have nifty little plaid thongs for men with bells. (The Tops already have there own b...s. |
Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 819
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 07, 2005 - 11:03 am: |
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Fanny, sounds good to me...a ladies shopping trip to the UK! Gotta say though, things are cheaper over here. 
Ahhhhh, but Katy that's the whole point. HE took her. It was the thought of us two innocent (Yeah, right!) ladies going to an unknown sex shop without protection that horrified Steve and Mr.B. Now so as long as Ann doesnt get spanked for us going against their wishes....my butt is safe. 
BTW Fanny, sex shops are easier to get to in England...they even have them in the malls! 
wolfie loves Steve more than anything else in the whole world...even more than chocolate and lobster!
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy.
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 1815
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 07, 2005 - 12:32 pm: |
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Good news Wolfie!! Woo-hoo lets head straight to them malls then.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 487
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 07, 2005 - 03:45 pm: |
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I'm back from a trip into the city center today and my friend and I hit ALL the "toy" shops. I HAVE MET MY MATCH when it comes to enjoying the experience. Although my friend is vanilla, her hubby is a spanko and she is fully aware of it and is ok with it as long as he doesn't try to include her. So we played, tried to get the CUTE guy behind the counter to help with demonstrations but he just turned beet red and laughed at us. He said we were the first ladies to come in that didn't act embarressed. Embarressed in a fun place to play?? Some people just don't know how to live.
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 821
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 07, 2005 - 05:01 pm: |
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Oh Shylah, I'm soooo jealous!
When we had the spanko get together in Toronto last May, we went to a couple of "toy" places. In one of them we bedeviled the cute salesguy, asking if we could try the toys on him first. He got a big kick out of our antics...I'm sure we brightened up his day. 
wolfie loves Steve more than anything else in the whole world...even more than chocolate and lobster!
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy.
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Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 489
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 07, 2005 - 05:19 pm: |
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This poor guy acted like he wanted to hide under his counter when I held up a pair of pink fluffy handcuffs and a leather paddle and asked if I could "try before I buy". I asked him to turn around so I could measure up his bum. He giggled like a girl and said NO NO NO. So I leaned on the counter and said...awww c'mon. You want a satisfied customer don't ya? He looked so lost I didn't have the heart to tease him much more. So we bought a couple of things and left. He did say to PLEASE come back soon!!!
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 823
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 07, 2005 - 07:52 pm: |
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I'm sure you made his day Shylah! 
wolfie loves Steve more than anything else in the whole world...even more than chocolate and lobster!
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy.
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Darwins
Junior Spanko
Username: Darwins
Post Number: 93
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 08, 2005 - 02:45 am: |
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Christmas is a funny time of year, a great contradiction between happiness and sadness, it seems no matter what you do there is always a wishfullness for those things you would like but can't have. It is not my favourite holiday I must confess.
As to young ladies taking shopping trips to places they shouldn't .......... well you may not get spanked for it........at least not directly, but I'm sure some spanks can be tacked on to other things to make up for it!
I'm a king bee baby Buzzing round your hive
we can make honey baby if you let me come inside
Come on babe lets buzzzzz a while.
(Rolling Stones)
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Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 824
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 08, 2005 - 07:27 am: |
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But that's not...........right! *pout*
C'mon ladies, he didnt say I couldnt go shopping over there without him. Let's see what kinds of mischief we can get up to. 
BTW Shylah, what part of the UK are you in? I'm usually down south.
wolfie loves Steve more than anything else in the whole world...even more than chocolate and lobster!
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy.
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Darwins
Junior Spanko
Username: Darwins
Post Number: 94
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 08, 2005 - 07:55 am: |
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If I say its right then its right,RIGHT?
No I didn't say you couldn't but I didn't say you could either..............
And pouting IS bookable!
I'm a king bee baby Buzzing round your hive
we can make honey baby if you let me come inside
Come on babe lets buzzzzz a while.
(Rolling Stones)
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Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 826
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 08, 2005 - 11:01 am: |
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*sigh* yes Sir. wolfie goes to get her book and put another mark in it.
But how am I supposed to know what I can and can't get away with do if you dont make things clearer? 
wolfie loves Steve more than anything else in the whole world...even more than chocolate and lobster!
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy.
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Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 492
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 08, 2005 - 11:22 am: |
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I'm in Suffolk near Ipswich. I'm from Oklahoma and they love my accent in the pubs. Did I say pubs?? Well girls, we DO need someplace to unwind after a long day in the toy shops!!! RIGHT????
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Tammynx
Spanko
Username: Tammynx
Post Number: 177
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 08, 2005 - 12:12 pm: |
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NOW you have my attention shylah...pubs are the place to be!!! I know Oklahoma very well too....
You just have to come back to the states for a visit soon.....you know where I am....you know we could have fun....  |
Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 828
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 08, 2005 - 04:18 pm: |
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I love pubs, we have nothing like them back here. Cozy, friendly with a roaring fire when it's cold out....one of my favorite places to be.
I'm down along the coast, about 3 1/2 hours away from you Shylah.
wolfie loves Steve more than anything else in the whole world...even more than chocolate and lobster!
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy.
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 1822
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 08, 2005 - 04:40 pm: |
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So here is the plan.....we start with a pub crawl and stop at all the sex shops along the way!!
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 493
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 08, 2005 - 05:34 pm: |
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WOO HOO!!! Sounds like a plan to me!!!
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 830
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 09, 2005 - 09:31 am: |
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I'm for that!
wolfie loves Steve more than anything else in the whole world...even more than chocolate and lobster!
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy.
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Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 496
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 09, 2005 - 10:39 am: |
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Pubs, toy shops and sisterhood. What more can you ask for???
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 1826
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 09, 2005 - 12:31 pm: |
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Not a thing else in the world, Shylah. Should I start my packing?
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Tammynx
Spanko
Username: Tammynx
Post Number: 182
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 09, 2005 - 01:01 pm: |
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I'm in on this one....I say we take a bus so we
can all fit!!! |
Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 497
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 09, 2005 - 02:41 pm: |
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Start packing now!! I'll get the king size inflatable mattress from the attic, stock up on wine, coke, whatever you like...I'll check the bus schedules and we're off!!!
And Tammy...that bus best have water wings...ROFL!!!
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 1830
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 09, 2005 - 03:10 pm: |
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Don't worry, I'm a good swimmer (if ya catch my drift!) Oh and don't forget the rum to put into that Coke.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 500
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 09, 2005 - 03:54 pm: |
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One bottle of rum commin up!!!
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 834
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 09, 2005 - 09:08 pm: |
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Oh my, this is going to be quite the party! 
Ummm...Tammy? You do realize that England is a across the ocean, yes? I dont think a bus will do it. 
wolfie loves Steve more than anything else in the whole world...even more than chocolate and lobster!
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy.
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Ziggy
Advanced Spanko
Username: Ziggy
Post Number: 1591
Registered: 08-2005
| | Posted on Monday, December 12, 2005 - 08:09 am: |
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I also don't have the holiday spirit. this christmas will be the first christmas without my best friend, we have been together on this holiday since grammer school. I still have alot of angry torwards her, her husband called and we both had a good cry LOL who said that soldiers don't cry, He will coming home for good in 4 months, Happy Holidays to everyone OK
when caught run faster then him !!
I am a TA junkie !!
TWO MORE WEEKS BEFORE MY HUBBIE COMES HOME AGAIN
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Tammynx
Spanko
Username: Tammynx
Post Number: 184
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Monday, December 12, 2005 - 08:28 am: |
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I'm sorry Ziggy....
Yes shylah I know I have to go over the ocean...I was thinking the plane then the bus??
That would work.... |
Ziggy
Advanced Spanko
Username: Ziggy
Post Number: 1593
Registered: 08-2005
| | Posted on Monday, December 12, 2005 - 08:31 am: |
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thank you tammynx, I will be fine !!
when caught run faster then him !!
I am a TA junkie !!
TWO MORE WEEKS BEFORE MY HUBBIE COMES HOME AGAIN
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Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 512
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 14, 2005 - 05:03 pm: |
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Sorry to have not been responding to this lately...I've been busy writing that spanking story that you all seem to be enjoying. thanks for the nice feedback!!
And Tammy...DUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Tammynx
Spanko
Username: Tammynx
Post Number: 186
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, December 14, 2005 - 07:17 pm: |
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ha ha... You are such a snot ball miss shylah!!!! |
Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 520
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 15, 2005 - 06:41 pm: |
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Sticks and stones may break my bones
but whips and chains excite me!!!!
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Sdhrts
Junior Spanko
Username: Sdhrts
Post Number: 92
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 16, 2005 - 10:49 am: |
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Toy shop is my next job!
Is IT Better To Give Than To Recieve?
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Shylah
Spanko
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 524
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Friday, December 16, 2005 - 10:57 am: |
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TOYS! TOYS! BUY MORE BATTERIES!!!
Take my heart and soul. But please don't step on it, it breaks easily.
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Everyday Life