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Smartnnaughty
Advanced Spanko
Username: Smartnnaughty
Post Number: 344
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 07, 2006 - 05:44 pm: | 
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I love spanking, especially GG spankings. And yet I know I need the discipline kind as well. My Guy gives me both. Yet, I yearn to be submissive to him in addition to the spankings.
At times I grasp what submission is and at other times it is like I don't have a clue. MG is very laid back and kind and there is a connection between us that is VERY STRONG. I have found that I need to be quietly submissive to him.
For instance, he will never come out and tell me what to do. So I watch for little preferences he may have. Once he told me that when he trained new employees he would tell them to open locked doors with two hands instead of pushing the key in and using the key to pull the door open. So I have tried to remember to do that when I open the door to my condo.
But really, what is submission and how does it manifest itself in your life? I am very interested in the topic and would love to hear about both ends of the continuum.
Any comments?
Everyone has a photographic memory, however, some just don't have film
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Blistering_blonde
Advanced Spanko
Username: Blistering_blonde
Post Number: 180
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 07, 2006 - 07:00 pm: |
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To be a Master
geocities.com/brandin_smith2000/Master.html
to be a submissive
Will you PROMPTLY obey orders, can he over power you or force you?, can you resist with words or actions?, are you willing to do for him serve him ....meet all his desires ..even if this means stuff like kneeling infront of him ..waiting for premission to eat , drink , use the bathroom ,..ok thats IN extreme case
a submissive is one who will do without much if any arguement ...as long as its an agreed upon before hand requset .. for instance ...if he says he wants dinner at 5 every night ..but you do not get home till 4:30 then you can agree upon a time ...more convienent
OR if he wants to do something ...like age play ..and you are against this ..you either come to a happy medium ..like you play a late teenager OR you never do ..YOU CAN NOT BE FORCED TO DO WHAT YOU DO NOT BELIEVE IN .you are NO MANS SLAVE
if he wants to use a crop on you and you think NOT ON YOUR LIFE ..then he has NO RIGHT
You see submissive is a GIFT ..YOU ONLY DO IT BECOUSE YOU LOVE AND TRUST HIM AND WANT TO DO FOR HIM.. you do what you can to make his life easier , happier ,
I call it agreed upon slavedom .you give alot of yourself you trust he will see it as a gift ..and at NO TIME is it DEMANDED of you against your wishes ..as long as you stay with in the guild lines you have agreed upon..should you faulter ...stumble in your serving him you talk it out ... he tells you how he felt let down you say WHY you did what you did ..or did not do .. and decide if it needs work upon
How it manifest in my life is I am not so upitdy anymore I think more of him and for him and less of my own needs ..(which is HIS JOB TO MEET)
(should you need a checklist on what you will allow and submit to ...email me I will send you a safty link..)
a Submissive ..loves to serve ...BUT is NOT a slave
He asked what I needed , timidly gave it at first, now he just knows.
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Obx_peach
New member
Username: Obx_peach
Post Number: 9
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 07, 2006 - 10:21 pm: |
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Blistering_blonde very well said .. |
Blistering_blonde
Advanced Spanko
Username: Blistering_blonde
Post Number: 182
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 07, 2006 - 11:07 pm: |
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Thank you Obx_peach !
He asked what I needed , timidly gave it at first, now he just knows.
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Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 917
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 07, 2006 - 11:37 pm: |
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Submission can be different for many people. It can depend on your relationship and your personality types.
For me, my submission is a gift I give willingly, lovingly, and with passion. I trust him with everything that I am and will be. We're in love and live together, with him as the dominant parther or HOH (Head of Household), so our lifestyle is a real-life 24/7 relationship. We live this lifestyle with all the daily grind stuff that comes up and have been very happy for the last couple of years. Maybe that still puts us in the "honeymoon" phase of our relationship, but since this isn't a first relationship for either of us, we have a little experience in this.
What we don't have is a regimented lifestyle, we just live it as part of our normal daily life. It's such a part of who we are personality-wise that it's only natural. It's hard to say exactly what I do because it's so much of who I am, but I'll try to explain as best I can.
I give him my submission and he gives me a hand to hold onto no matter what. He gives me the support I need to go out into the world and be the person that I am. He supports me in every way and by that, he allows me to flourish because I know I have a rock solid foundation to hold me up and a man who loves me completely and without reservation behind me every step of the way.
My submission isn't just about cooking, cleaning, or taking care of him, it's about giving him respect, love, and my acceptance of his power as a dominant man. We nurture those personality traits in each other that make us what we are. Him as the dominant one and me as the submissive one.
As part of my submission, I do what I can to show him I respect his dominance and accept it willingly. I don't get smart-mouthed with him (okay, only occasionally, very mildly and playfully when teasing him), ridicule him, or do things I know he won't appreciate. That's one way I practice my submission, by being a supportive, caring, and respectful partner.
Dan practices a quiet sort of domination. He's a big bear of a man so it's easy to feel submissive to him, but there's also a certain current running through him that gives him that dominant air. He doesn't have to get physical to show his dominance, he can just give me a look and I go right into sub mode. And there's a certain tone he uses that just turns me into subbie putty because it gets to me everytime.
He's also very good with the compliments. I love sitting at his feet while he pets my head and talks to me. And if he calls me a good girl, I almost purr.
And he doesn't run our life without my input either, he's always thinking of me and always asks my opinion about things. He looks out for me every chance he gets and reminds me often that he just wants to take care of me. I can be hard to take care of sometimes though, then he has to "remind" me how important I am to him.
Dan guides me in my submission by giving me limits and guidelines to follow. I bow to his dominance by following those guidelines and I express my gratitude for his willingness to take on this responsibility by showing him the respect he deserves.
I have given him the right to take me in hand when I need it. He knows this is a special gift and he'd never abuse it. He's always been very consistent so I don't ever have to wonder where I stand with him. I know what my limits are and I do my best to stay within them. He knows what to do if I start slipping and brings me back on course. I appreciate that because it makes me feel safe and keeps me centered.
I don't know if all this rambling will make any sense to anyone, but it's how I feel. I love Dan with all my being and my submission to him is just a natural part of that love. |
Subbie
Spanko
Username: Subbie
Post Number: 57
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, June 08, 2006 - 09:40 am: |
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I am sure it is dfferent for each person, seems easier to live as a submissive then to explain it. of course we having our erotic spankings as well as a spanking every so often that renforces his position as the Dom and mine as the sub.
As submissive I regard him as the lord and master of the house and I am there to serve him. and he is there to comfort and protect me, look after my well being. he guides me and listens to me but doesn't run over the top of me either.
He also allows me to be myself, I don't have to hide my submissive feelings and he sees me as no other ever has. I enjoy pleasing him and there is not too much I would not do for him.I see no difference between our marriage than those who aren't into this life style, ours is based on love and respect, just like theirs.
my name says it all
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Tammynx
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Tammynx
Post Number: 668
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, June 08, 2006 - 10:13 am: |
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I really like what Bethie had to say.
My husband and I have been living this lifestyle for almost 6 years. We have been married for 3.
I submit to him because I respect him. He in turn respects me. Yes he is the HOH. However, my opinions and thoughts are as equal as his.
My husband is my Husband first, my Dom second, my friend and lover ALWAYS.
I'm natually submissive in many ways...he is naturally Dominate in most ways. We work, its really as simple as that.
I don't call him Sir...unless I'm being spanked, and then it is out of respect. He doesn't instill fear in me. I respect him because he has earned that. |
Smartnnaughty
Advanced Spanko
Username: Smartnnaughty
Post Number: 345
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, June 08, 2006 - 02:02 pm: |
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Everyone,
Thank you for your well thought out answers. I think at this exact moment, I am seeing submission as just another name for love. If I love my HOH, then I don't have to be right or in control. Respectfulness is a close second.
Thank you all for your thought provoking answers!
SNN
Everyone has a photographic memory, however, some just don't have film
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Blistering_blonde
Advanced Spanko
Username: Blistering_blonde
Post Number: 206
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, June 08, 2006 - 02:07 pm: |
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By Jove I think she 's got it *S* thats right you do NOT need to be right, or in control ..BUT you are NO MANS doorstep either ...you have the rights to your likes and dislikes ..to say no when need be ..and have YOUR opionions respected ..he is after all suppose to look out fo your well being ..not be your father and raise you ...you make disions just as much as he does ..but are willing to try his way a lil more often then if you were not submissive *S* good luck
He asked what I needed , timidly gave it at first, now he just knows.
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Tammynx
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Tammynx
Post Number: 671
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, June 08, 2006 - 04:52 pm: |
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What it comes down to Smartnnaughty is...its really up to you and your SO and what you like and what you are comfortable with. Stick with that and you have no worries!!! |
Hunny
New member
Username: Hunny
Post Number: 2
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Sunday, June 11, 2006 - 02:43 am: |
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My deffintion of submission is very simple actually even though it is a complex thing:
giving myself soul and body to the man i love now and forever. trusting him to push me to places beyond my widest dreams.
As for how it manifests itself in your life...well that completely depends on you and how you put it there |
Nicenick06
New member
Username: Nicenick06
Post Number: 17
Registered: 02-2006
| | Posted on Sunday, June 11, 2006 - 02:51 am: |
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Pushing me to places…..
I like that – I think that is important…. |
Mistydawn
Spanko
Username: Mistydawn
Post Number: 87
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, June 21, 2006 - 02:05 pm: |
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To me the gift of my submission is the ultimate gift of love.
I want him to know how much I love him and I'm prepared to do anything for him.
Submission is not easy for me. I'm not natuarally submissive but that's what makes it more powerful. I do not take direction well but its a need in me to give myself completely to him even though at times I find it very hard.
He is steadfast and loves me so unconditionally it is scary.
I want to give and show some of that back.
It also gives me a peace I never found when I was running the show. Being submissive actually allows me to be stronger and gives me a freedom to be the best me I can without me to hold me back.
In submission I have the permission to achieve and shine. In freedom I sabotage and will always think of ways of thwarting myself.
I have only being doing this 6 months but the one thing I have learnt is that everyone is unique and has a differnt take on things. Follow your own hearts and it will take you where you want to be.
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MistyDawn
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Learning to love and loving to learn
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Prof_top
New member
Username: Prof_top
Post Number: 1
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, June 22, 2006 - 08:40 am: |
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New here and so unaware of how these things work on internet. What I know I have learned without the obvious help offered here. It strikes me as odd, as I catch up on these on going talks that there is little male input on such an important subject. Clearly, each sub has a kind of inner play that they work with. The Dom's job and great privilege, is not just like a director geetting more out of an actress than she knew she had in her, but to mold it to his needs, and than see if a life can be built from that. |
Mistydawn
Spanko
Username: Mistydawn
Post Number: 88
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Thursday, June 22, 2006 - 05:32 pm: |
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Hi Proftop
'To mould to his needs' might only be the view point of SOME Doms. My dom for instance IS more like a director, he does get a lot of perks along the way mindst you f
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MistyDawn
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Learning to love and loving to learn
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Prof_top
New member
Username: Prof_top
Post Number: 2
Registered: 06-2006
| | Posted on Friday, June 23, 2006 - 01:40 am: |
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what I said, or meant to try to say, is that being a wise Dom isn't limited to being a director butt, sort of speak entails more than that. |
Smartnnaughty
Advanced Spanko
Username: Smartnnaughty
Post Number: 346
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Friday, June 30, 2006 - 09:55 pm: |
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Yes, Prof top, I know what you mean. Both the Dom and the Sub are enriched by the experience. And pushing limits is one way they both can grow.
SNN
Everyone has a photographic memory, however, some just don't have film
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Rimfire
New member
Username: Rimfire
Post Number: 12
Registered: 11-2009
| | Posted on Saturday, November 28, 2009 - 10:11 am: |
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my wife isnt as submissive as id like but when i met her she was extreamly timid,at 46 years od age i taught her to drive,she needed self-cofidence,now however she hasnt learned the diffrence between-self importance and submission out of respect! |
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