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Edge
New member
Username: Edge
Post Number: 7
Registered: 05-2008
| | Posted on Sunday, October 19, 2008 - 03:15 pm: | 
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Hey y'all.
Thought I would share this....
Last week I accidently left 2 rounds in the rifle I was using at the range. The next morning, because the gun is new, my husband decided to take some weight off the trigger to make it easier to shoot. Well, he found the first round but not the second. The gun went off and put a hole all the way thru our leather couch AND the sliding glass door behind it. After that, we don't know where it went, but we would not be surprised if our neighbors are wondering how the plant pot on the lanai shattered.
I know better. Always have. I've been taught gun safety since I was a kid. When I realized what I had done, I just freaked. I couldn't believe it. --Edit--
I just came right out and asked for a spanking. I can't use my ADHD as an excuse. I've shot guns for 30 years and I have NEVER left one loaded even though I treat all guns as if they loaded. Unfortunately, he feels that he is at fault as much as I am because he didn't check it first. Still, I'm the one that set the whole thing in motion.
Any comments on what I could say to try to change his point of view? I think that even though he made a mistake as well, he is the HOH and has the maturity to deal with himself without outside influence and/or a soar bum.
Thanx,
Edge
(Message edited by bethie on October 19, 2008)
and did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a play? ~ Pink Floyd
All fled - all done, so lift me on the pyre - the feast is over and the lamps expire. ~~ Robert E. Howard
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Tawseman
Spanko
Username: Tawseman
Post Number: 20
Registered: 07-2008
| | Posted on Sunday, October 19, 2008 - 05:01 pm: |
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"I just came right out and asked for a spanking. I can't use my ADHD as an excuse. I've shot guns for 30 years and I have NEVER left one loaded even though I treat all guns as if they loaded. Unfortunately, he feels that he is at fault as much as I am because he didn't check it first. Still, I'm the one that set the whole thing in motion.
Any comments on what I could say to try to change his point of view? I think that even though he made a mistake as well, he is the HOH and has the maturity to deal with himself without outside influence and/or a soar bum."
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First, say a thank you prayer that no one was harmed.
And he is right that he is at fault as much as you. What part of his point of view do you want to change?
You both screwed up, and you will probably benefit from a spanking. Did he refuse? Either way, he sounds like a fair and thoughtful man.
Perhaps if you tell him you need a spanking just to release all the stress the situation generated.
.
(Message edited by tawseman on October 19, 2008) |
Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 1939
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Sunday, October 19, 2008 - 06:53 pm: |
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Edge, in another post you said that your husband was uncomfortable with punishment spankings. Has something happened to change his mind? If not, I'd suggest another tactic. If he's feeling guilty about this episode, then I don't think having him give you a punishment spanking that he isn't comfortable with would help the situation and might even make him feel worse.
Honestly, I'd suggest you two take a refresher course in gun safety. He's right, you both made mistakes. There's no excuse for "accidently" leaving rounds in your rifle and the first rule of gun safety is to always handle a gun as though it's loaded. You made the first mistake and he made the other.
Talk this out and do whatever is best for your relationship. Good luck! |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 3597
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Sunday, October 19, 2008 - 07:26 pm: |
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This topic is a huge one, that in my opinion, does not belong in a spanking discussion. A spanking would not bring back a dead body.
Take Bethie's advise and learn safety or get rid of the gun.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Wolfie
Prime Spanko
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 1946
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Sunday, October 19, 2008 - 10:58 pm: |
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You both messed up, you were very lucky...thank all the gods above that no one was hurt! 
I think your husband is being sensible, and you both should do something to "make up for" the accident. Taking a gun safety course together is a good idea, and how about taking the money to repair the window and couch out of a fund you may have for a trip or fun time out? That way you both will remember the next time to be super careful! 
If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you.
Grow old with me, the best is yet to be.
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Tawseman
Spanko
Username: Tawseman
Post Number: 21
Registered: 07-2008
| | Posted on Sunday, October 19, 2008 - 11:58 pm: |
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Wolfie, you sort read my mind. I was formulating a thought that since he is HOH, he might be above the law, so to speak, but so was royalty. Often, when a royal screwed up, they would perform a public act of contrition, or penance.
I was thinking of something on the order of selling something he likes, and using the money for firearms education for kids, or something like that.
. |
Wolfie
Prime Spanko
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 1948
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Monday, October 20, 2008 - 09:45 am: |
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That would work as well Tawseman, just as long as they both feel that they've paid for their mistake. 
If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you.
Grow old with me, the best is yet to be.
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Edge
New member
Username: Edge
Post Number: 8
Registered: 05-2008
| | Posted on Monday, October 20, 2008 - 01:23 pm: |
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Let's be careful here not to lose track of the subject, my friends.
The issue is not gun safety rules. I can quote them in my sleep and I practice them as a matter of habit. I don't have to think about checking to make sure a gun is safe at all times, I do it automatically. But like other hobbies that involve dangerous implements, no matter how good you are, because you are human, you will at some point make a mistake.
If you own a motorcycle, at some point you will lay it down. It's the law of averages. Taking a safety course at that point is only going to reinforce what you already know, it won't teach you not to get complacent, and even if it does, we humans forget over time. That's how accidents happen and they will happen no matter how vigilant you are.
If you own a boat, you will eventually find yourself in a life-threatening situation. Why else do we require life jackets at all times?
I have studied FL law, I belong to the NRA, and I have a concealed to carry permit. They don't hand those out like business cards, you have to jump through a lot of hoops to earn the right to arm yourself.
My point in even mentioning what happened was not to label myself as an incompetent, careless person. I'm just angry with myself for allowing myself to get distracted which led up to my carelessness.
My HOH is no more comfortable with spanking as punishment as he ever has been. I was simply hoping this incident was serious enough to change his point of view. He is considering maintenance spankings as a stress reliever for both of us. He struggles with how best to deal with me. Most men would have divorced me a long time ago, so I am thankful he stays and we talk things out. I don't like to push the issue (of spanking) because he's been thru a lot with me and he doesn't need yet another illness/quirk/kink or whatever to have to cope with right now.
He knows what I want and why. Now he has to decide for himself.
In the end, we have learned a valuable lesson, and in my prayers I thank GOD no one was hurt. It cost $540.00 to replace the glass door. I won't be able to pay for my trip to Texas to see my baby grandson.....I'd rather take a spanking.
My intention in all this was to vent my anger at myself and get some ideas about how to deal with my husband. While I appreciate the advice on dealing with the accident, it's the challenge of convincing a gentleman that he's still a gentleman even if he spanks his wife. That's the gist of all of this.
I'm sorry. I tend to talk in circles and I'm hard to understand. This forum seems really friendly. I signed on because I need patient and friendly advice and I have gotten it in spades. I appreciate it very much. I don't expect to be understood. I will figure this out eventually with patience and friendship with people who understand my kink. I'm still trying to understand it myself.
Finally, I know I tend to blog instead of post. If this is a problem, please let me know.
Thanx!!
Edge
and did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a play? ~ Pink Floyd
All fled - all done, so lift me on the pyre - the feast is over and the lamps expire. ~~ Robert E. Howard
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Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 3598
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Monday, October 20, 2008 - 02:06 pm: |
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"I don't like to push the issue (of spanking) because he's been thru a lot with me and he doesn't need yet another illness/quirk/kink or whatever to have to cope with right now.
He knows what I want and why. Now he has to decide for himself."
Exactly, Edge. Pardon us for jumping in the deep end with this issue, but as I said, something as dangerous as this is not a spanking issue. Please do not carry on with dangerous activities in order to earn yourself a spanking. You are going to have to respect your husband's discomfort with punishment spankings, until and when he is comfortable with it.
Keep in mind that for a spanking to be consensual, BOTH parites have to be comfortable, and he obviously is not.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Ladykayra
Spanko
Username: Ladykayra
Post Number: 33
Registered: 03-2008
| | Posted on Monday, October 20, 2008 - 03:58 pm: |
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Edge,
I am sorry about what happen, glad no one got hurt.
How about approching your HOH again now that a few days has cleared his mind, and explain to him that you feel you need this spanking. Share with him the post you posted to us and let him understand just where you coming from.
Maybe he will understand more if he sees how you are feeling then simply listening. We tend to put our thoughts more into what we write then what we say at a moment.
I think this would be a good time to start with maintences spankings. If nothing else, ask him for one, and in his mind he is giving a maintence spanking, but for you its a means to get the spanking you feel you need for this.
When my HOH spanks me at times, I think of it as a spanking I needed for this or that. When its over I normally write what I was feeling, which helps him understand my mind frame.
Good luck |
Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 1940
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Monday, October 20, 2008 - 06:33 pm: |
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Edge, what you did is part of the subject so we didn't lose track of it. You can't expect to have a disciplinary relationship without talking about the behavior that would warrant discipline. This incident may not be one that falls into that category. You may need to handle this situation differently and as a couple.
Discipline doesn't always have to involve spanking. Some couples who practice DD don't spank at all and others only spank for certain misbehaviors. It's about the dynamic between the people in that relationship.
If you want your husband to be HOH, then you should defer to him on this subject, especially since he's not ready to practice punishment spanking. Should he decide he's comfortable with discipline and it's appropriate, then he needs to decide when to spank and when to handle a situation in a different way, not all situations can be resolved with a spanking. This may be one of them.
Btw, I suggested a refresher course for the two of you to take in an effort to help the two of you get through this together. It never hurts to refresh that sort of thing especially after an incident like this. I also have a concealed license so I know what it takes (I don't remember any hoops though  ) but I firmly believe that you can always benefit from a refresher course. It helps to be walked through the steps by someone other than yourself. |
Wolfie
Prime Spanko
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 1950
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, October 21, 2008 - 12:10 am: |
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quote:The issue is not gun safety rules. I can quote them in my sleep and I practice them as a matter of habit. I don't have to think about checking to make sure a gun is safe at all times, I do it automatically.
You got distracted and careless...but you dont need a refresher course? I'm sorry Edge, but that sounds a tad arrogant to me. 
quote:My HOH is no more comfortable with spanking as punishment as he ever has been.
Then nothing you do will force him to feel more comfortable with it...in fact he may move farther away from disciplinary spanking if he thinks you set him up.
quote:It cost $540.00 to replace the glass door. I won't be able to pay for my trip to Texas to see my baby grandson.....I'd rather take a spanking.
Of course you would...it's all about what you want after all. But missing a trip to see a beloved grandchild seems like a pretty good punishment to me. Maybe next time your working with with a loaded firearm you'll remember how much you wanted to see him, and be more careful.
If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you.
Grow old with me, the best is yet to be.
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Edge
New member
Username: Edge
Post Number: 9
Registered: 05-2008
| | Posted on Tuesday, October 21, 2008 - 01:48 am: |
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I want to thank all of you for your various points of view. It seems to me this is being turned into a debate on the responsibilities of gun ownership and I don't think that's appropriate for this forum.
Hubby and I have been talking about this ever since it happened and I leave it to him to decide how to handle it. We have studied DD and know how it works, we are just still sorting out whether both of us want a DD lifestyle and how we would approach it. I originally presented it a few months ago as an alternative to medications to help me control my ADHD behaviors. Those drugs are dangerous and I refuse to take them. I know my odd, impulsive behavior bothers other people more than it bothers me. We talk about trying DD to help me. I don't think it's something that can be decided in a day or even a week. I am confident we will find a happy medium as we always do. Wish us luck!
I appreciate your wisdom Ladykayra.
And ---Edit by admin---
Thanx,
Edge
(Message edited by bethie on October 21, 2008)
and did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a play? ~ Pink Floyd
All fled - all done, so lift me on the pyre - the feast is over and the lamps expire. ~~ Robert E. Howard
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Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 1941
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, October 21, 2008 - 02:26 am: |
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Edge, I've tried to be patient with you but I won't tolerate you being rude to other members. I edited that part before it could cause any hurt feelings.
We were discussing the topic as you presented it. Isn't the name of this thread "A REALLY big screw up" after all? We were discussing the screw up. Sorry if you don't like what we had to say, but when you open a discussion, you open it up to honest and frank responses. Just because you don't like what we have to say doesn't give you the right to be rude.
I hope we can close this topic now as I think it's no longer productive. |
Admin
Board Administrator
Username: Admin
Post Number: 112
Registered: 03-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, October 21, 2008 - 10:47 pm: |
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Thread closed. |
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