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Mrpanda
New member
Username: Mrpanda
Post Number: 1
Registered: 01-2009
| | Posted on Thursday, January 08, 2009 - 08:26 am: | 
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-- MrPanda's first post --
A story, with a question: I first realised this was my thing when I was ?. I found some random pixelated gif on the net of a spanking scene that gave me butterflies like nothing else. When you know, you know. Fast forward 6 years, and I've been with a lovely girl for a year. Some time ago we were discussing what sort of thing she'd like to get up to in the bedroom and she did puppy eyes and said, "A spanking?"
Now, that's quite a gift from heaven! She was apparently quite worried that I'd have a problem with it, or not understand. I proved her wrong, and happily obliged on more than one occasion - but she doesn't know the extent to which this is my thing. Herein lies the rub - while I can understand that the whole spanking thing does things for me - nothing else in the world even comes close - I get a bit worried at times. From a logical point of view, sex and violence are not things that belong together. Sex should be something that happens between two people who care very much for each other, and hurting the other person is something we shouldn't be doing in 2009...right?
So, while I can understand that there's probably no way I can change what gets my Peter at attention, I do wonder whether it's something I should try to change in my self. At your most intimate moments, your thoughts should be at how much you love the person, not how much of a whalloping you want to give them...?
Thoughts, SD?
-- Oh, and the registration asked for my email, and where I am. I lied on both accounts, my private affairs are my private affairs 
(Message edited by bethie on January 08, 2009) |
Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 1974
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, January 08, 2009 - 01:45 pm: |
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Mrpanda, if you had lied about your email address you wouldn't have received an activation email. If you changed your email address since then, make sure it's a valid one because we don't allow members to keep accounts if they don't have one.
You are quite welcome to keep your location private, and I encourage people not to reveal too much, but the email requirement is a different story. Yes, those are your private affairs, but telling me you are lying to me about a requirement of membership doesn't inspire me to open up and share any intimate info with you here. Sorry, but that's the way I feel. |
Mrpanda
New member
Username: Mrpanda
Post Number: 2
Registered: 01-2009
| | Posted on Friday, January 09, 2009 - 06:14 am: |
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I meant that I didn't use my day-to-day email address, that's all. Sorry for any confusion. |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 3626
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Friday, January 09, 2009 - 11:26 am: |
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mrpanda, I am taking the time to write you even though currently I am in great physical post- operative pain and am typing with one finger lying in bed.
You do not give yourself a lot of credibility to begin with. First of all, you obviously did not read the site protocol before you posted as you broke one of the biggest rules by referring to underage activity. Secondly, this is an site where everyone keeps their identity private, so why the lie about your address when we all went through the same registration process as you and know you need to give a legitimate email address? No one would have given a second thought to who you are or what you do, if you had not written about lying. We are an adult site and behave as one.
If you had taken the time to read any of the threads here, you would not have to ask your question. You are correct sex and violence do not go together, but you are mixing apples with oranges.
As I have mentioned in the past, spanking between two consenting adults is not abuse or violence. It is similiar to trying to compare sex with rape. One is a wonderful act to share and the other is a crime. Spanking is probably the most common fetish worldwide and its intention is not to hurt someone you care about.
If you are concerned that you are hurting her, then at least one of you is not consenting, and that breaks another big site protocol rule.
You need to ask yourself some revealing questions, not us. Do you feel you are harming your partner? If so, then stop with the spanking, you are doing it for the wrong reasons.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Mrpanda
New member
Username: Mrpanda
Post Number: 3
Registered: 01-2009
| | Posted on Sunday, January 11, 2009 - 05:08 am: |
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>> mrpanda, I am taking the time to write you even though currently I am in great physical post- operative pain and am typing with one finger lying in bed
Thank you, I appreciate it.
>> You do not give yourself a lot of credibility to begin with. First of all, you obviously did not read the site protocol before you posted as you broke one of the biggest rules by referring to underage activity.
I see where you mean now, I'll be more careful in future.
>> Secondly, this is an site where everyone keeps their identity private,
The registration page requires my full name, country and state as well...that's hardly conductive to keeping one's identity private.
>> so why the lie about your address
My "real email address" is tied very, very strongly to my real-life identity. I used an email account opened just for this forum.
>> If you are concerned that you are hurting her, then at least one of you is not consenting, and that breaks another big site protocol rule.
I never wrote that. I wrote that I am concerned about what sort of person this makes me...nothing more.
I can see that I got started on the wrong foot here, but thanks for having taken the time to reply anyway. |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 3628
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Sunday, January 11, 2009 - 02:04 pm: |
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Everyone can rest assured that NO personal information goes out to anyone at this site, and listing a state and country hardly makes it easy to track one down. And, honestly as long as you give a legitimate email address, no one knows if the state and country are correct anyway.
If your personal email address is one that gives too much information, that is what alternate email addresses are for. My guess would be that most of the members here use Yahoo, Hot Mail, G-Mail or one of the many places that give you some identity protection. I personally have four email addresses. One for business, one for personal mail and two for registering at sites. Besides my business address, none give away any personal information, but I chose not to have emails pop up at my personal email that can be seen by anyone who happens to be the room.
Yes, each and every one of us has our own private life and our affairs are no one else's business. You simply learn to protect yourself.
If anyone wants to email you, they can do through your profile which does not actually give any information but simply states "to send a message to...." If you chose to reply to them, there is a box to click that will hide your email address.
My point is, that is does not start you out on the right foot by admitting to lying as if you were bragging about it. It will make people cautious of you.
Your question is a legitimate one, and if you spend some time researching and reading, you will realize that you are not alone. Everyone here has probably asked this at some point in their life.
But you came to a spanking site, so you have to expect that all of us have come to the conclusion that spanking between two consenting adults is a thrilling and pleasurable activity to us. The buttocks is an erogenous zone and stimlation to that area is going to cause excitment. Not everyone will agree that spanking is exciting, so sites like this are around to give us the support we need to undestand that we are not alone in our desires.
You are very young, so therefore may not realize that it has not been a very long ago that spanking was very mainstream and many television shows and films showed an adult being spanked.
What any of us want to do in privacy, because we find it to be a sexual turn-on, is fine as long as both people agree and consent.
Therefore, my answer to your question is no, you do not need to worry about your interest in spanking as long as you do not push it on someone who does not share your views. Apparently your have found someone who shares your enjoyment, so have fun with it.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Mrpanda
New member
Username: Mrpanda
Post Number: 4
Registered: 01-2009
| | Posted on Thursday, January 15, 2009 - 09:11 am: |
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Thanks a lot for the advice. I'm sorry, again, about the tone in that first post. |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 3647
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, January 15, 2009 - 11:47 pm: |
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You are more than welcome. I hope we hear more from you.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Nawteeone
New member
Username: Nawteeone
Post Number: 4
Registered: 01-2009
| | Posted on Monday, January 19, 2009 - 06:11 pm: |
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Seriously, I think the movie Secretary does such a great job showing how it's OK as long as both parties are OK with it. Forget what society says!
Having a submissive nature in regards to bedroom- related activities only (i am the family breadwinner, and make all of the financial decisions in our home) I once struggled with the conflict.....I am a strong, intelligent, independent woman, and just the word "submissive" when attached to "females" in general brings up images of ladies who can't do for themselves, so they let someone else do for them. I don't know WHY these images come up, and I'm not saying it's right or anything, but for whatever reason, in my head, I have struggled.
However, the bottom line is this: When 2 people can be open enough to discuss and explore the things they like, it is a rare and wonderful thing. I like to be spanked and dominated, yes, but ONLY by the man I love and trust. It turns me on, it turns him on. No harm in that-everyone wins! |
Shylah
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Shylah
Post Number: 2207
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, January 22, 2009 - 08:52 am: |
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You make very valid points Nawteeone.
A person does not have to be a doormat to be a submissive/bottom
You will find that this forum is full of women and men that in everyday life are strong, intelligent and independent people who do not need anyone holding their hand all the time. To accept that they prefer to be spanked does not take away from any of that.
It's just how we are.
Every time I say the word "exercise" I wash my mouth out with chocolate
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