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Subbie
Advanced Spanko
Username: Subbie
Post Number: 183
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Sunday, April 05, 2009 - 11:11 am: | 
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My husband and I enjoyed a good relaxing life with spankings being part of it, but after his adult daughter moved back home which was supposed to be for a month or two but it lasted well over a year, the feelings and the bonding that we had together, became a time filled with stress, our privacy was gone, spankings had to stop and then I just didn't want to do it anymore even when she was gone for a weekend.
Our loving sex life all but disappeared.it is now over 6 months that we have talked about getting started again, and I have been the one dragging my feet on this but now have different feelings and want to return, but don't know how to do it.
My husband says we may never have what we did have but we can make it better. I hope so, just a little bit afraid to start, although I know I can submit to him.
Please help me,
my name says it all
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Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 2002
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Wednesday, April 08, 2009 - 12:24 am: |
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Subbie, I'm sorry things have been so hard for you and yours. I'm just glad you two are talking about the situation; that's a great start!
My suggestion is to relax and don't let yourself get overcome with doubt. Most relationships have ups and downs, it happens, but don't let it overwhelm you. And don't let your fear keep you from jump starting your love life. Take it slow and get to know your husband again.
Have you thought of planning a "date night" to ease you into the mood? It doesn't even have to be a big night out; it can be private time set aside to give the two of you a chance to re-connect. Is there an activity (besides spanking) you haven't had a chance to enjoy with the daughter there?
Getting reconnected with each other might let you relax and remind you of the romantic and spanking dynamic you had before. You may not be able to take up where you left off, but you may be able to start moving back in that direction. 
Does any of this help?
Good luck, hon, and keep us updated!  |
Subbie
Advanced Spanko
Username: Subbie
Post Number: 185
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Wednesday, April 08, 2009 - 06:49 am: |
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Thanks Bethie,and yes it helped
You are right about the ups and downs, the part that really bothers me and takes the edge off our prvate life is I beleve that his daughter is a snoop,I took all our toys etc and got them out of the house, she is her fathers daughter and surley has a right to visit but I dont think I am up to hiding the paddles etc in the trunk of my car every time she comes to visit, which means it will be a over night. I don't want to put my husband in the middle either as that brings it's own problems.
I really want to have DD back in our life, I thought that we could plan a get away next Friday,go to the shore and walk in the sand wouud be nice, leave the cell phones home and just disappear for a day or two.
I'll let you know who we do....Subbie
my name says it all
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Lil_bit
Spanko
Username: Lil_bit
Post Number: 91
Registered: 05-2007
| | Posted on Wednesday, April 08, 2009 - 08:10 am: |
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Subbie it sounds like you are moving in the right direction to get back to where you were before (or a close place). As for hiding your paddles etc. have you thought about buying a locking trunk/chest? You should be able to find one for a decent price and just add it to the bedroom. It's locked so no one can get into it without the key and you don't have to hide everything when someone comes.
Good luck
Life is not about the amount of breaths you take, its about the moments that take your breath away.
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Tawseman
Spanko
Username: Tawseman
Post Number: 66
Registered: 07-2008
| | Posted on Wednesday, April 08, 2009 - 12:47 pm: |
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Quote: Lil_bit......"As for hiding your paddles etc. have you thought about buying a locking trunk/chest?"
--------------------------------------------------
There are also a number of locking rifle, shotgun and bow cases that fit under a bed or stand up in a closet. Even a small suitcase can serve.
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Subbie
Advanced Spanko
Username: Subbie
Post Number: 188
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Saturday, April 11, 2009 - 10:46 am: |
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Thanks for the advice, I know I probably should have put the toys in a lockable box and may end up doing it, but I do have to get past the problem of why should I have to hide anything,I would never dream of being in someone else home and sneak in their bedroom and go thru their drawers, but that is one issue my hubby and I will have to deal with and be able to move on and get back our life....subbie
my name says it all
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Subbie
Advanced Spanko
Username: Subbie
Post Number: 191
Registered: 05-2006
| | Posted on Monday, April 20, 2009 - 06:28 am: |
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The weekend went well, maybe too well!! it was a good get away and have lots of time just by ourselves, being down the shore and walking with the ocean water going over our boots did create a whole different atmosphere.
Friday nite I got a bare hand bare bottom erotic spanking, first one in almost 2 years, we both enjoyed it so much we did a repeat on Saturday nite.
My sub side hasen't felt that good in a long time.it seems hubby was going to save the best for last, or it was going to be his best part. yesterday after we got home he took me up stairs to our bedroom got out our spanking toys, and over his knee I went, got a sound spanking with the paddle and bath brush and then a does of the belt.needless to say I am sitting on a pillow this morning, best part is I don't have to go back to work until Wednesday.
Non submissives may not understaand this but I have needed that for a long time, just glad we are getting our marriage back together again, and be able to enjoy our kinky but good life together.subbie
my name says it all
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Bethie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Bethie
Post Number: 2016
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Monday, April 20, 2009 - 03:49 pm: |
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 I'm so happy for you two, Subbie! Enjoy your tender bottom and all those good subbie feelings.  |
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