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Message |
    
Jena_j
Spanko
Username: Jena_j
Post Number: 17
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Thursday, June 30, 2011 - 02:51 pm: | 
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OK lets start with I have obviously lost my mind. I have just placed a personal as looking for a switch (thought it would be safer). I used a fake name as I do here and a new email that has no way to be traced back to me. Any advice on personal ads? This seems so dangerous.I want to experience being spanked but shit there has to be a safer way. |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 52
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Thursday, June 30, 2011 - 03:20 pm: |
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There is never any guarantee, whatever ad you place, that you aren't going to meet a psychopath. At least with an ad you have your preferences up front. You don't have the awkward moment of revealing to some guy on date one or date five "Oh, by the way, there's something you should know about me...."
I've used ads, but I would never ever meet anyone for play until we've met first in a public place. This is mutually beneficial. And even after this, you have to be careful. But remember this: lots of people are into spanking. Often, in person, they seem so ordinary and normal you'd be surprised. For every horrifying date-went-wrong there must be ten thousand good ones. I cannot think of any safer way to meet spankos. It's not as if mutual friends can match you up---though, come to think of it, that probably does happen.
You haven't lost your mind. You're proceeding intelligently to find a partner who is on the same page as you are. And how lucky you are to live today, where both the sexual zeitgeist and the technology are evolving in your favor. Try finding a sexual partner in 1960, or say, 1912. Go ahead, try it!!
You might wish to underplay the description of your appetites spankually. (That's not a word, I know.) Don't say, I'd like to be beaten raw with a fraternity paddle, even if that is what you fantasize about. Err on the side of moderation. "I'm looking for a nice guy who enjoys giving his woman a frisky, playful spanking" might be the way to go. If, when you are alone, you want to upgrade from friskiness to something a little more intense, I doubt your partner will object.
All of the above is pretty obvious. Sorry. I'm just trying to help you, you naughty girl. |
Zippo
Prime Spanko
Username: Zippo
Post Number: 1782
Registered: 09-2005
| | Posted on Saturday, July 02, 2011 - 07:24 pm: |
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Jena,
I would add a few points to Warmpalms advice. First, is do not be in too much of a hurry to meet someone who does respond to your ad. Take some time and get to know them. Try and get a feel of how they respond to different situations. Ask them how they envision your first play date going. Will they respect your limits and use of a safe word?
I agree with Warmpalm about meeting in a public place, but even then, you still need to use caution, and protect yourself. Arrange with a friend to have a safe call. Let them know when you arrive safely, have them call you during the meeting, and have a few code words arranged so you can let them know how the date is progressing good or bad, this will also give you a means of ending the date if things are not progressing the way you like saying there is an emergency at home I need to tend to. Call this person when the meeting is concluded and you are on your way home so they know that you are safe. I personally do not play on the first meeting, I like for both of us to go home and digest who we just met, there may be other questions or concerns you want clarified before proceeding that just did not come up during the meeting.
As far as the ad itself, I would try to be as honest as you can about your spanking interests, you don't need to disclose things like severity, but be honest about the aspects you seek, it will help provide a more compatible match. Unless you are into switching, I wouldn't dismiss a Top only, the risk is about the same, you are still placing your bottom in someone elses hands, trust and good communication is essential with either.
One other note, with online ads, you will run across people who will not read your entire ad (if at all) and send you a message proclaiming they are the one for you. Take your time, you can usually sort them out after talking with them for a bit.
Also, you can try a spanking or fetish club in your area, many of these clubs have places to play onsite,(completely optional on your part) and do have protocols in place making a bit of a safer route. Try googling spanking and your area and see what it comes up with. It can also allow you to talk with others who may have scened with a particular person before and you can get their feedback on them.
Good luck and stay safe!
The Brat Tamer...changing brats attitudes one smack at a time
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Jena
New member
Username: Jena
Post Number: 4
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Saturday, July 02, 2011 - 11:41 pm: |
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I have got to say I LOVE THE DEN!! Everybody is so nice and understanding. I mean really...I am talking to people I don't know about about being crazy hot for being spanked. There are not a lot of places where that is acceptable. I feel like I am getting a "spanking education" as well as great advice. Thanks!!!! |
Her_guy
Spanko
Username: Her_guy
Post Number: 66
Registered: 12-2006
| | Posted on Sunday, July 03, 2011 - 06:16 am: |
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Hi Jena,
I agree with that. There are very few places like this that we can feel comfortable talking about this subject.
I may have missed this elsewhere but have you been spanked before, or are you just starting on this journey?
If this is your first time, please be very careful about who you pick. This forum is a great resource that you can use as a "truth detector" to screen candidates' motives.
Best regards,
Ed |
Jena
New member
Username: Jena
Post Number: 5
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Sunday, July 03, 2011 - 09:10 am: |
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I have never been spanked. I think I would also enjoy giving a spanking. I will be super careful. Maybe a bottom would be a good choice. We could trade spankings? |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 57
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Sunday, July 03, 2011 - 11:28 am: |
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Jena, I would be honored to top and to bottom you. I'm not sure "top" and "bottom" are transitive verbs, but my junior high school English teacher is quite dead, so who cares?
I got a sweet note once from a girl I had recently spanked. She said, among other things, "you do have a fantastic rear end!" Next time we got together....well, we traded. What can I say, is this a great country or what? |
Jena
New member
Username: Jena
Post Number: 6
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Sunday, July 03, 2011 - 12:46 pm: |
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Warmpalm I should be so lucky. I couldn't refuse if I tried! |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 58
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Sunday, July 03, 2011 - 01:04 pm: |
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And why would you ever try, Jena? |
Jena
New member
Username: Jena
Post Number: 9
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Saturday, July 09, 2011 - 04:53 pm: |
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I am talking to a woman who wants to spank me. How hot is that! We will see if it happends. I almost met with a guy but when we talked on the phone I knew it was not a good idea. I am so excited that I may need to go for a run. I am waiting for a call or email. |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 63
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Saturday, July 09, 2011 - 05:35 pm: |
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Jena, if this woman spanks you, all of your devoted fans at Spanking Den want and deserve a full report afterwards. No names need be divulged, but otherwise you simply must provide us with soup-to-nuts post-spanking wrapup commentary. Lots of details and quotations and description, please.
My cautions about being cautious still apply. Some women are bodybuilders, after all. |
Jena
New member
Username: Jena
Post Number: 10
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Saturday, July 09, 2011 - 09:53 pm: |
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I will give a play by play! She sounded serious. She said that she expected the spanking to start over my cloths but it would end on my bare bottom.Oh shit, OMG, now I am in for it. I hope she contacts me. I mean really it's about time I got my ass spanked. |
Yorkie69
Spanko
Username: Yorkie69
Post Number: 89
Registered: 08-2010
| | Posted on Sunday, July 10, 2011 - 05:48 am: |
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I hope it works out for you Jena but please be careful. |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 64
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Sunday, July 10, 2011 - 06:53 am: |
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For all of my teasing, I agree with Yorkie69. I would hesitate to conclude that because your spanker is female, she lacks the might to really hurt you if she has a mind to.
This first spanking, your first real spanking, may well shape your attitudes about spanking for the long haul, and it would be so awful if it were a bad encounter. Proceed cautiously. Use safe words, be careful what implements you consent to, and be ready to back out if things don't seem right when you meet her.
Let us know how it goes. |
Her_guy
Spanko
Username: Her_guy
Post Number: 67
Registered: 12-2006
| | Posted on Sunday, July 10, 2011 - 09:05 pm: |
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Miss Jena,
I'm really looking forward to hearing all about this one. It does sound hot. But I reiterate the other's sentiments. Be careful! Are you sure it's really a woman?
Best regards,
Ed |
Jena
New member
Username: Jena
Post Number: 11
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Monday, July 11, 2011 - 09:18 am: |
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Thanks everyone! Great advice. I am being very careful. Hugs!!! |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 65
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Tuesday, July 12, 2011 - 07:54 pm: |
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Jena: do you have a meeting scheduled? |
Jena
New member
Username: Jena
Post Number: 12
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 09:04 am: |
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The woman would not meet me in a public place. She wanted to get a hotel. I said NO! I am getting emails from all over the US from potential spankers. I will take my time and find the right spanker. I know, I know the world is tired my hearing about how bad I need my ass spanked. There will be a sigh of relief and maybe applause when I finaly get the ass whpping in so obviously deserve and have asked for. Lol |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 66
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Wednesday, July 13, 2011 - 11:09 am: |
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The suspense is unbelievable. But congratulations, Jena, on resisting the invitation to meet in a hotel. That is indeed a worrying signal. I don't understand some people. She had an eager spankee who wanted to meet her, and she refuses to meet in a public place? Not to impugn somebody I've never met, and I know we're supposed to maintain civility on this site, but...what a dang fool!!! If you wanted me to meet you at the top of the Seattle Space Needle, I'd be on the next plane!!
You might want to bear in mind the possibility that one's first-ever spanking, like one's first-ever session of sex, can easily prove very disappointing. Even depressing. For any number of reasons. Your partner and you aren't really simpatico, he or she isn't very skilled or sympathetic or generous, the circumstances are less than ideal....or maybe the fantasy has reached such a high level of intensity than any real-life realization is going to pale in comparison.
So, Jena dear, by all means search carefully for that right first spanker. No need to rush. But if the first time is only okay, or less than okay, you shouldn't get too glum. Or assume the problem is you. Am I making sense? |
Yorkie69
Spanko
Username: Yorkie69
Post Number: 90
Registered: 08-2010
| | Posted on Thursday, July 14, 2011 - 05:35 am: |
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Nice one Jena. Glad you didn't go through with that. Good luck with the search though! |
Tess
New member
Username: Tess
Post Number: 9
Registered: 07-2011
| | Posted on Friday, July 15, 2011 - 01:39 pm: |
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Could not help but put a few words,not only for Jena.
Do not be so trusting with a person you hardly know.
I think its better to get to know the persons before asking to be spanked.
NEVER NEVER accept to be tied up by some one you don't know that well.
Hell knows how many psychopaths are out there.
Tread careful. |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 76
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Friday, July 15, 2011 - 03:22 pm: |
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I don't even like to be tied up on the telephone by somebody I don't know that well. Good advice, Tess! |
Tess
New member
Username: Tess
Post Number: 10
Registered: 07-2011
| | Posted on Friday, July 15, 2011 - 03:30 pm: |
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I humble bow my head dear Warmpalm. |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 82
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Saturday, July 16, 2011 - 04:47 pm: |
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Thank you, Tess. You are a sweetheart. |
Tess
New member
Username: Tess
Post Number: 15
Registered: 07-2011
| | Posted on Sunday, July 17, 2011 - 04:12 am: |
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If you only new  |
Jena
New member
Username: Jena
Post Number: 13
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Sunday, July 17, 2011 - 07:57 pm: |
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I have had a great weekend. My ass is scorched! My exhusband happily concented to spanking my ass! Wow! I showed him Spanking Tube to get him in the mood. Showed him my favorit videos. It got him as hot as it gets me. He got his share of ass whip too. He is flying back on the 30th for some more fun. Another weekend like this and I will be remarried! |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 85
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Sunday, July 17, 2011 - 08:43 pm: |
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Wow! That is truly inspiring. How wonderful. He and you both sound like good, good people. Open-minded. Oh, how I wish I had been a fly on the wall. Well, not really. Flies eat excrement. I wouldn't like that. But I wish I could have watched you guys mend the rift with spanking!!! It's a funny old world, innit? |
Tess
Spanko
Username: Tess
Post Number: 18
Registered: 07-2011
| | Posted on Monday, July 18, 2011 - 04:41 am: |
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It sure is lol.
Glad for you Jen!! |
Jena
New member
Username: Jena
Post Number: 14
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Monday, July 18, 2011 - 10:51 am: |
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My experience has done nothing to cool my jets. It has just made me crazy hot. I know it can't be like this forever. Can it? How would any work get done in the world? Speaking of which, I need to get off the computer and get some work done lol. |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 86
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Monday, July 18, 2011 - 11:05 am: |
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"I need to get some work done"? That's crazy talk, Jena. You need to luxuriate in the afterglow....and to enhance the afterglow by telling your dear friends on Spanking Den....your dear Spanking Denmembers....all about your fanny-toasting.
Is your bottom still sore? Did your ex-husband have the courtesy to smooth some cream into your fiery buttocks? |
Jena
New member
Username: Jena
Post Number: 15
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Tuesday, July 19, 2011 - 03:43 pm: |
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You want details. Ok We started on Saturady evening. I was told to bend over his lap and take my pants down OMG. He spanked me for a good 10 min with his hand. Then I went to the bathroom and bent over the bathtub with my hands on the tub, ass in the air for 2 min. with a hairbrush (ouch!). (Other stuff on the eadge of the tub, use your imagination). Then it was time to lay on the bed for a belt spanking (nice). Other activities and sleep. The next morning pretty much a repet of the night befor. |
Tess
Spanko
Username: Tess
Post Number: 19
Registered: 07-2011
| | Posted on Wednesday, July 20, 2011 - 09:49 am: |
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Nice!!! |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 87
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Wednesday, July 20, 2011 - 11:05 am: |
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Very nice. Spanking, sleep, repeat. I approve. Has your fanny recovered nicely? |
Fred2010
Spanko
Username: Fred2010
Post Number: 55
Registered: 06-2010
| | Posted on Wednesday, July 20, 2011 - 07:07 pm: |
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There has got to be sex in it or the spanking is useless. |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 90
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Wednesday, July 20, 2011 - 08:20 pm: |
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Some would disagree----they want purely disciplinary spankings. In many cases, this is obviously going to be sexual anyway, but I've encountered women who seem sincere in their wish to be spanked as behavior modification and that alone. They want somebody to take control and give them incentive to stop smoking or stop overspending or what have you. |
Tess
Spanko
Username: Tess
Post Number: 21
Registered: 07-2011
| | Posted on Thursday, July 21, 2011 - 05:11 am: |
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Some times yes but not necessarily always. |
Jena
Spanko
Username: Jena
Post Number: 16
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Friday, July 22, 2011 - 06:39 am: |
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Spanking is very sexually exciting for me, no doubt. But I could be spanked and not have sex. I want a woman to spank me someday but am not planning to have sex with her. It a fantasy of mine to be spanked by a woman. She will then go home and I can take care of any personal needs that I may surely have. |
Yorkie69
Spanko
Username: Yorkie69
Post Number: 91
Registered: 08-2010
| | Posted on Friday, July 22, 2011 - 09:29 am: |
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Nice one Jena. I'm so happy for you!  |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 101
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Saturday, July 23, 2011 - 07:11 pm: |
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If you can locate a woman willing to spank you but not have sex, more power to you. But I need not tell you the importance of having this absolutely crystal-clear before you even meet.
I spanked a young woman once. She didn't want sex, and because she had been open about this from the beginning, I didn't pester her for it. But I'm a gentleman. And not all men are. Not all ladies are either, for that matter.
It's best to be absolutely clear. Don't be coy, don't tease with "Well, we'll see what happens". Don't play with her head. You know all this, this post is for the benefit of others reading this. |
Jena
Spanko
Username: Jena
Post Number: 17
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Sunday, July 24, 2011 - 07:25 am: |
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I always want sex I am just very particular whth whom I choose to share that with. I could maybe have safe sex (haz mat suit...) Getting spanked by a woman on a regular basis would be sooooo hot! |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 102
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Sunday, July 24, 2011 - 09:04 am: |
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I've never had sex in a hazmat suit. Problematic. Oh, sure, I've had sex in a Bugs Bunny costume, lots of times, but who hasn't?
A regularly scheduled spanking. Every Wednesday at 5:30, say. Something to look forward to. That is indeed hot. Maybe you could hire a cleaning lady and have a little talk with her about some special requirements you have.... |
Jena
Spanko
Username: Jena
Post Number: 18
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Wednesday, July 27, 2011 - 12:51 pm: |
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I am now interviewing women to beat my ass! OMG how hot. I can barely stand it. One lives close and another wants to visit! I am being careful, stating my limits clearly, but I can hardly wait. I am going to a gettogether where birthday spanking will be given for July and August BD's. I have a Aug BD. This will be Friday night. I will give details to my pals at The Den!!! |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 117
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Wednesday, July 27, 2011 - 08:21 pm: |
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Jena, I hope you are not using language like "beat my ass." That's a perfumed invitation to misery. |
Tess
Spanko
Username: Tess
Post Number: 39
Registered: 07-2011
| | Posted on Thursday, July 28, 2011 - 12:34 pm: |
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Wow you found woman to spank you that's great!
Just be careful ok?
Birthday spanking!that has been a fantasy of mine for so long.
You will give the details! cannot wait to read them.
 |
Jena
Spanko
Username: Jena
Post Number: 20
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Friday, July 29, 2011 - 02:03 pm: |
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Tonight is the night! Mistress E is going to spank me. I am sooo HOT, scaired shitless, and excited. I just can't wait! It will be in private section of a club. I have never been to a club like this. Semi formal dress code. Wow...shiver...OMG. This is a process of personal growth. What a month! |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 3739
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Friday, July 29, 2011 - 02:10 pm: |
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Sounds like fun....enjoy!
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Tess
Spanko
Username: Tess
Post Number: 41
Registered: 07-2011
| | Posted on Friday, July 29, 2011 - 05:18 pm: |
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Have fun!! |
Verywideawake1
New member
Username: Verywideawake1
Post Number: 12
Registered: 05-2010
| | Posted on Saturday, July 30, 2011 - 02:32 am: |
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Jena...I have to agree with Warmpalm. Please be careful of words and phrases that contain things like "Beat" There is a point at which a spanking, even if consensual, can cross the line into violence. If someone is using that language, or responding when you use that language, it could very well be someone with a true sadistic streak who could really hurt you.
I know the excitement, thrill, anticipation that comes with wanting a spanking, finding someone willing to spank you and then going ahead and meeting. It's easy to make a decision that is not well considered. (I've done it once myself....meeting a spanker at his house BEFORE we met in public....we'd talked extensively online and on the phone, and been clear about boundaries, but still....BAD idea on my part. It ended fine, I;m lucky, but it could well not have.)
So...we hate to be your annoying, protective siblings here, but please do be careful!
(Message edited by Verywideawake1 on July 30, 2011) |
Verywideawake1
New member
Username: Verywideawake1
Post Number: 13
Registered: 05-2010
| | Posted on Saturday, July 30, 2011 - 02:40 am: |
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And....to Fred and others re: sex and spanking...I've never had sex with anyone who has spanked me. To me they are just seperate things. Sex is sex, and spanking is spanking. Is spanking sexy and sexually exciting? Yes. But once it's about sex, it's no longer about spanking, and if I've got someone willing to spank me, *that's* what I want to focus on.
Now, I've never been in a romantic relationship that included spanking...my spanking partners have been only that...spanking partners. My perspective may change if I were in a relationship with someone who was also spanking me for spanking's sake |
Fred2010
Spanko
Username: Fred2010
Post Number: 57
Registered: 06-2010
| | Posted on Saturday, July 30, 2011 - 06:13 am: |
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So what is in it for the spanker? |
Tess
Spanko
Username: Tess
Post Number: 43
Registered: 07-2011
| | Posted on Saturday, July 30, 2011 - 07:43 am: |
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Ah that's easy to answer being the dominion one turns him/her on. |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 3742
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Saturday, July 30, 2011 - 09:30 am: |
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Fred....are you implying that if there is no sex after the spanking, that the spanker gets no satisfaction? I think there are others who will disagree.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Verywideawake1
New member
Username: Verywideawake1
Post Number: 14
Registered: 05-2010
| | Posted on Saturday, July 30, 2011 - 01:33 pm: |
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Fred...what's in it for the spanker without sex? Well...if spanking is purely a sexual kink, than maybe not much. But if you're into spanking for its own sake (spanker or spankee) then potentially lots of things.
Some things I've heard mentioned from a spanker's point of view include
-the feeling of power/control/domination
-the actual sensations of the hand or the implement you're holding striking flesh
-the sight of a bottom jiggling as it is spanked
-the sight of a red, well spanked bottom
-the sounds a spankee makes
-the physical feeling of having someone over your knee, holding them in place, having them completely under your control in that moment
And are all of these things sexually exciting? Well sure, judging from the state of the spanker by the time he's finished. But do you have to have sex every time you're turned on? No, of course not. One spanker told me that it's actually *more* arousing in a way to spank a woman and know that you can't have sex with her...it gives her a certain mystery, he said, to have her so under your control and then not quite get to do everything you want. He said it's the same as how, sometimes, seeing a woman in a short skirt or a top showing cleavage can be sexier than seeing her naked...there's still some mystery. |
Fred2010
Spanko
Username: Fred2010
Post Number: 58
Registered: 06-2010
| | Posted on Saturday, July 30, 2011 - 01:44 pm: |
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No Fanny, I am not implying that the spanker has to have sex with the spanked at all but my interest in spanking is linked to my libido. I have only engaged in spanking as part of foreplay so my experience is limited. I can well imagine spanking someone without having sex afterward but I am sure to need some outlay later on and would draw on the memory and relive it in imagination. It would seem to me that some form of sex-play would be appropriate after a spanking, perhaps as an expression of gratitude, or maybe, as part of the continuing humiliation some appear to crave. I imagine that the discipline spanking some people here talk about is also sexual but the sex come into play at another time. |
Fred2010
Spanko
Username: Fred2010
Post Number: 59
Registered: 06-2010
| | Posted on Saturday, July 30, 2011 - 01:50 pm: |
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In my case frustration might trump mystery. All the ractions you mentioned are, as you say, sexually exciting. I would say that spanking without the sexual dimension would be like eating food without experiencing its taste. |
Verywideawake1
New member
Username: Verywideawake1
Post Number: 15
Registered: 05-2010
| | Posted on Saturday, July 30, 2011 - 02:15 pm: |
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Interesting, where...if we're using a metaphor, I would compare spanking and sex to serving some sort of subtly flavoured delicacy and putting a delectable heavy sauce or glaze over the top.
Is the glaze good? Sure. Does it ruin the flavoour of the food? No, not really, but it might mean you don't pick up on all the subtleties you may have if you concentrated on enjoying the food alone.
edited to add: Sorry...admins, should these last few posts be moved to a new thread about spanking and sex [or no sex], or are we OK to continue here
(Message edited by Verywideawake1 on July 30, 2011) |
Fred2010
Spanko
Username: Fred2010
Post Number: 60
Registered: 06-2010
| | Posted on Saturday, July 30, 2011 - 02:39 pm: |
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As a switch, do you Vw1 find doing the spanking, sexually exciting? |
Verywideawake1
Spanko
Username: Verywideawake1
Post Number: 18
Registered: 05-2010
| | Posted on Saturday, July 30, 2011 - 02:53 pm: |
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Fred, I've never actually administered a spanking to anyone, but I would really like to, and the idea certainly is sexually exciting, even without having to imagine any sex acts along with the spanking. |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 3743
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Saturday, July 30, 2011 - 07:20 pm: |
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My opinion, spanking is an intimate act, where skin meets skin in a very arousing place. It would be difficult not to be aroused. However, sex like spanking, needs to be consensual and the details should be very clear in advance. Anyone who has had their hormones run a bit out of control knows that at times, there can be a regret about going to far too quickly. With my husband, we both get turned on, and frequently act upon it. With anyone else who spanks me, sex is NOT on the menu. My husband and I agree that when it comes to disciplinary spankings, I respond much better when it is administered by a disciplinarian. Although, it may be difficult for some people to wrap their head around this idea, loving discipline is a great stress release for both parties. After I am well spanked, I usually just want to be tucked into bed to sleep or rest. Most of the time, my negative behavior is the result of being over tired, so it works great. I would be leery of anyone who feels they need to be given "gratitude" for administering a much needed spanking. I will only play with those who are on the same page with me on this. If arousal needs to be dealt with, it can be done with a sexual partner or self-relief.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Fred2010
Spanko
Username: Fred2010
Post Number: 61
Registered: 06-2010
| | Posted on Saturday, July 30, 2011 - 09:07 pm: |
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Interesting, so how do you go about finding someone to give you a spanking? I have found it easier to have sex with someone than to invite her over my knee. Spanking has usually (few times only) come up after a well-developed sexual relationship had been developed.
Outside an intimate relationship, I would find it impossible to initiate a spanking session. But now, thinking back, I do recall several women who were not girlfriends at all but who hinted at their interest in being spanked. Unfortunately, I was too ashamed of my own interest in spanking to follow up on the hint. |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 120
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Saturday, July 30, 2011 - 11:37 pm: |
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You could say "Millions of women like being spanked. Sounds like you could be one of them, am I right?"
And remember this yourself the next time you feel ashamed in your interest in spanking. You don't pick your preferences, they're baked in. And the volume of spanking sites out there ought to reassure you that it's incredibly popular---hence, in a funny way, normal. 'Everybody's sin is nobody's sin.'
Do you want to beat women up? Do you want to torture them? I doubt it extremely. You want to engage in consensual spanking with a woman who enjoys it. Who is being hurt here? Nobody. |
Jena
Spanko
Username: Jena
Post Number: 22
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Sunday, July 31, 2011 - 10:06 am: |
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Update: Last night, my true first experience was the best. I was with a married dom. No sex. low lighting, music, an amazing room. Started out with a massage. Than hand spanked, strapped, paddeled , three floggers, and a whip. All very slow at the start and built up. Ass, back, legs. Way erotic. Very hot!!! No bruses today. |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 3745
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Sunday, July 31, 2011 - 10:52 am: |
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Excellent Jena.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 121
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Sunday, July 31, 2011 - 11:15 am: |
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Hand spanked, strapped, paddled, flogged, and whipped.....and no bruises? Wow! This guy knows his stuff.
Will you see him again? |
Jena
Spanko
Username: Jena
Post Number: 23
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Sunday, July 31, 2011 - 12:07 pm: |
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Yes! He and his wife (bottom) are interested in future meetings! She likes to watch me getting it, I like to watch her getting it. He is very experienced. I was sure I would be brused today, but nope. Now I am a little sore, but in a good way! Got picked up after by my exhubby and we spent an amazing night together. Amazing morning too. Maybe an amazing afternoon if I am lucky! |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 122
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Sunday, July 31, 2011 - 01:49 pm: |
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Can't beat that!!! (Well, you can, but that's kind of the point!) |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 3746
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Sunday, July 31, 2011 - 06:01 pm: |
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Sounds as if you are getting it all. Best wishes.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Jena
Spanko
Username: Jena
Post Number: 32
Registered: 06-2011
| | Posted on Wednesday, August 10, 2011 - 01:05 pm: |
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Thank you all! Fanny, Warmpalm, Tess, Verywideawake. I am having such a blast. I couldn't have done it without you all! This stuff is sooo erotic. |
Warmpalm
Spanko
Username: Warmpalm
Post Number: 141
Registered: 05-2011
| | Posted on Wednesday, August 10, 2011 - 02:10 pm: |
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You're welcome, Jena. We all wish you exhilarating spanking and intoxicating orasmic nirvanas. Or is it intoxicating orgasmic utopias? Whatever. |
Yorkie69
Spanko
Username: Yorkie69
Post Number: 99
Registered: 08-2010
| | Posted on Thursday, August 11, 2011 - 08:36 am: |
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Well done Jena. So glad you're getting what you desire! |
Tess
Spanko
Username: Tess
Post Number: 55
Registered: 07-2011
| | Posted on Thursday, August 11, 2011 - 11:25 am: |
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Glad you're having fun Jena,life does not seem so boring now does it! |
Fanny
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Fanny
Post Number: 3757
Registered: 05-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, August 11, 2011 - 02:50 pm: |
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Happy to hear you are having fun. Whether you chose to make this an erotic experience is besides the point and none of our business unless YOU chose to share.
Queen of Innocence
"Well behaved woman rarely make history"
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Spanking Discussion Area