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Celticbratt
Junior Spanko
Username: Celticbratt
Post Number: 98
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Monday, December 05, 2005 - 08:34 am: | 
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Hi everyone- I wanted to post and tell you that I went to my first munch with the local Kink Society group yesterday...what a hoot. I feel like SUCH a grown-up...heeheehee.Everyone was so nice, and went out of their way to make a newbie like me feel welcome. It was kinda funny though- we were at a local hotel, in their dining room, and around us are families, a huge group of little old ladies who belong to the Red Hat society...And there we are- heeheehee. I found it humerous that people didn't censor their speech when the waitress came around. They just continued to talk about the last time they were whipped, or how the last party was SO much fun when so-and-so was wrapped in Saran wrap...I used to work as a waitress, and I GUARANTEE that she went back to the kitchen LAUGHING HER ASS OFF, and couldn't wait to tell everyone in the kitchen about the kinky freaks sitting in the corporate section...lol.It was neat, and I'm looking forward to interacting with then all again.I recommend this step to anyone out there looking for a partener. One of the nice female Doms talked with me for quite a while, and was telling me how every year, they have at least one couple who come together after meeting at one of the functions. It was really cool. |
Ftopinmichigan
Spanko
Username: Ftopinmichigan
Post Number: 216
Registered: 09-2005
| | Posted on Monday, December 05, 2005 - 01:16 pm: |
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Hi, Celticbratt. I'm so glad that you enjoyed your first munch. It sounds like there were some very welcoming people there. It always helps to find a friendly group.
I have to say that it's not very typical for people to continue to chat with outsiders (including families) around. Unless the servers are told in advance of the "type" of group, most people respect the privacy of others, and that of the servers. The "chat" usually only continues, when in private rooms, completely away from others (servers and other patrons). Not only is being loud a bit nonconsensual, it's also an issue of possibly outting others, especially, if like you said, the wait staff will go giggling back into the kitchen (not knowing who they may tell at that point).
When going to a munch, in your own neck of the woods, you never know who may be present, whether at the munch, in the location you're attending, or within the serving staff even. To talk so blatantly loud really puts the entire group at risk. Most groups have strict rules against involving others into the group's subject matter.
I ran a BDSM singles group, and one of seasoned members invited a patron of the establishment (where we were using a private back room), into our violet wand demo. Not only did this put the entire membership that was in attendance, at risk, it jeopardized us using the private facility. They knew we were a "singles" group, and that our "interest" were somewhat outside the norm, but they were not aware of our BDSM interests, until the patron entered our Demo. It put 'me' at risk, the members at risk, the business at risk, and my father too, as it was a club he was a member at.
I understand the "fun" part of it all, but there are certain implications to be THAT "out" there. Not everyone is out, and willing to let others in on why they are attending a group function/munch.
Our munch folks, for the most part, are respectful of others, especially "families," when it comes to lifestyle conversations. There are always a few boisterous types, that enjoy being loud and obnoxious (and getting the attention of anyone outside of the group), or new folks that just are too excited and get loud, but most people keep the conversations to the group.
I hope you have no backlash from the experience, and that it remains positive. |
Domglyn
New member
Username: Domglyn
Post Number: 14
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Monday, December 05, 2005 - 06:09 pm: |
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let me corrrect some of the impressions that my sweet subbie may not know.
1 the wait staff is totally aware of our groups orentation and has been for 5 years. we don't get lifestyle with them its mostly a vanilla dinner or lunch and the level of our voices is normal dinner levels not loud by any measure. oh by the way our normal staff waiters are 2 in the lifestyle & one lesbian that accepts the right to choice. they were also asked if there were any objection to working with us.
2 we were not in a public space we were in a area above and blocked from view from below.
3 as a group we are not loud nor do we impose on the public, to get to the corprate eating area we pass through the public area..yes there were red hat socity members floating around the public area.but again we weren't in the public area
4 for public consumpion we are a computer programers group so master and slave is not a uncomman term lol
we are very careful of public incursion into our space and all are very aware of who is in the space. |
Ftopinmichigan
Spanko
Username: Ftopinmichigan
Post Number: 217
Registered: 09-2005
| | Posted on Monday, December 05, 2005 - 07:17 pm: |
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 Glad to know, Domglyn! Sounds more like it, from most of my own experiences with many group functions.
Still sounds like she had a great time, and that's what counts too!
K |
Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado
Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 817
Registered: 04-2005
| | Posted on Monday, December 05, 2005 - 11:24 pm: |
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I'm glad you had fun Celticbratt, munches can be a blast.
Funnily enough, I had just the opposite problem at a munch I went to. This was a group in my area and I was very excited to meet some folks who were local...up to this point only going to a munch with the New York/New Jersey group. Anyway, we met at a nice restaurant in the evening and were put in an out of the way corner. Eventually there were about 15 people there. No one introduced themselves, greeted me or said a word about spanking or bdsm the whole night! I can understand keeping your voices down, or talking quietly and discreetly to your neighbor...but nothing? I'm not shy among other bdsm'ers or wanting to hide my kink, so I never went back. I prefer friendlier folk. 
wolfie loves Steve more than anything else in the whole world...even more than chocolate and lobster!
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy.
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Ftopinmichigan
Spanko
Username: Ftopinmichigan
Post Number: 219
Registered: 09-2005
| | Posted on Tuesday, December 06, 2005 - 07:23 am: |
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Wolfie, I'm sorry you weren't treated better at your first munch.
My friend and I are working to greet new looking folks, at several munches in our area (when we go, which is not too often lately). She's told me how much it meant to her, when she came to her first munch, that I greeted her, and helped her feel comfortable...yet, I didn't think a thing about it, when I was doing it. Together, we make a conscious effort now, with others that appear to be new.
We have a group here that would appear to be mostly vanilla too, although THEY are more than friendly with greeting folks. See, they usually meet twice a week, with a coffee midweek, and a "family" dinner on Sundays. The group is for a specific area (a bit of a distance for me to enjoy attending so often), so all of their members enjoy getting together to break up their week. Because they see one another so often, they usually talk vanilla stuff...daily life things.
If everyone would remember how they felt coming out, to an event, they might be more gracious toward new folks. I've also talked with many people that felt like you did, and they never returned to the public scene. All groups will not be like the one you experienced, and in fact, the one you attended, may not even be like that again, if you returned.
I don't know if you'd want to travel a bit for a gathering and party, but TES and DomSubFriends, in NYC have some great people in the organizations. We were just in town for a few weekends, over the years, and were fortunate enough to be there when things were going on. I felt very welcomed. They had things scheduled before the club opened, and I honestly felt like I was part of the group, even though I was just visiting.
K |
Katie_spades
New member
Username: Katie_spades
Post Number: 4
Registered: 11-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 08, 2005 - 03:00 am: |
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Can anyone give me any tips about where there might be a social or munch or play area, preferably, near the Boston area? My fiance is very interested in spanking me in front of others but the nearest place we can think of is New York. With my being in school it's difficult to get away just for this so any ideas relatively close to the Boston area would be welcome! Thanks!
So naughty
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Ftopinmichigan
Spanko
Username: Ftopinmichigan
Post Number: 220
Registered: 09-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 08, 2005 - 08:19 am: |
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Hi, Katie.
This is from an old list, of Spankinyourtown, so I don't know how many links may still be working.
Massachusetts--
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/MassachusettsSpanking
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ness
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/BostonAreaSpanking
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/spanking_in_mass/
If you join the Yahoo Groups, if they're still active, you might find someone that knows more about your area.
K |
Sdhrts
Junior Spanko
Username: Sdhrts
Post Number: 85
Registered: 10-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 08, 2005 - 09:29 am: |
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There is a munch in Taunton Ma at Gillians Resteraunt. It happens monthly and all you have to do is say I'm with Andy's party on the way in. I'll post the next date when I get the e-mail
Is IT Better To Give Than To Recieve?
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Katie_spades
New member
Username: Katie_spades
Post Number: 23
Registered: 11-2005
| | Posted on Thursday, December 08, 2005 - 03:37 pm: |
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wow - Ftop and Sdhrts! Those suggestions are great and will pass them along to Jake... BTW Ftop, he's going to post some pics of me tonight and my work will actually be available next week, some of it anyway!
Please sir, I don't need a spanking. I'll be good, I promise!
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