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Redhinney
Spanko Username: Redhinney
Post Number: 384 Registered: 10-2005
| Posted on Tuesday, April 11, 2006 - 07:23 pm: |
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The last couple of days maybe about a week I have been in a snit a really bad one. Bill warned me at least 1 dozen times an I really am trying but it seems that I'm not able to break this spell as I had in the past. Usually when he warns me I stop but this time I can't. I know why I like this and it seems I have lose trust in someone who is close to me _NO not Bill but someone who I thought wouldn't hurt me and to make matters worse this person works for me. OK Bill has given me until 10:30 tomorrow to get this thing straighten out or I will be in for a good old fashion whipping (his words - I didn't know we owned a whip. I think he does me spanking). I told him I thought that that was a rather harsh sentence. He told me his spanking because I am not facing up to my responiblities and in our relationship owning up to responbilities is a must. So tommorrow I have to tell a person who I have known for 25 years that I found out what she is doing and as a results she will be terminated. I hve decided that I would allow her to leave gracefully if she choses but if she makes a fuss I will fire her right than and there. By the way her crime was she falseified time sheets and expense reports to the tune of $4,000. I am so sad becasue if she needed the money all she had to do was ask I would have given it to her no questions asked As funny and crazy as I am normally this has made my heart so heavy I just can't seem to get past it. Maybe tommorrow after I have the conversation with her I will take Bill up on his suggestion Bill bless his heart even said he would do a stress relieve spanking but to be honest it's not stress I'm feeling it's heart ache and I'm not sure a spanking would help. Love can't always be seen or heard but will always be felt with your heart
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Spankablebelle
New member Username: Spankablebelle
Post Number: 4 Registered: 04-2006
| Posted on Tuesday, April 11, 2006 - 08:10 pm: |
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Red, It must be horrible to have someone so close to you betray your trust, but you are showing how much strength and kindness you have by letting her go gracefully. Your friend should be grateful that you were the one that found out and not someone who would turn her in to the courts where she would face fines and jail time. As for the spanking end of things...I'm no expert and I'm pretty new to this board, but I'm sure you and Bill will work it out |
Pillow_girl
New member Username: Pillow_girl
Post Number: 29 Registered: 03-2006
| Posted on Wednesday, April 12, 2006 - 01:39 am: |
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it is hard to deal with somone " stabbing you in the back " I can sure understand how you feel, this is one time i don't think a spanking would help, well it wouldn't help me in a situation like that. breaking the trust you had in her hurts enough,...my two cents worth...best of luck
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Pinkcheeks
Spanko Username: Pinkcheeks
Post Number: 268 Registered: 12-2005
| Posted on Wednesday, April 12, 2006 - 04:30 am: |
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Red, since you and Bill have been together for so long, I am sure the two of you will figure out what is best in terms of a spanking. Imho, I don't think you can spank away heart-ache - although I do see Bill's point about not facing up to responsibilities. **this case might be a bit different though - and if you follow thru today and get the situation resolved with this woman, then maybe what you need is just a good stong shoulder to cry on, and your man's arms around you I agree with Belle, it is going to be a very difficult time for you - especially since you have known this woman for 25 years! But...to falsify time sheets and expense reports is a very serious matter. Letting her know and giving her the option to leave is very generous on your part. Best of luck Red....we are here for you "Thought I WAS being a good girl...really I did!"
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Wolfie
Moderator/Spanking Aficionado Username: Wolfie
Post Number: 1518 Registered: 04-2005
| Posted on Wednesday, April 12, 2006 - 04:48 pm: |
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I'm sorry Red, this is an awful thing to go thru. I dont think spanking will help either...just lots of cuddling and time. If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you. Grow old with me, the best is yet to be.
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Redhinney
Spanko Username: Redhinney
Post Number: 385 Registered: 10-2005
| Posted on Wednesday, April 12, 2006 - 06:42 pm: |
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Ok I did it I actually fired my first person since I started my company. It was horrible She said some mean and nasty things and things that just aren't true but I am sure se is angry and upset. I some how knew that it was happenig a little and I mentioned at a staff meeting that time sheet and expenes reports are not a place to see how good a fiction writer everyone can be but a legal document that has to be true due to IRS rules regarding deductions. It stopped for a while but it started back up. Here is a strange fact that makes this even harder. This person was my first boss when I was a bed side RN and when I moved up into manangment she was one step a head of me so in a way I reported to her but I keep on moving up and she didn't. WHne I started the company she applied for a position as a nurse auditor and I welcome her with open arms. I think I'm upset more becasue at one time this person was my mentor I so wanted to be her. I never understood why she didn't move up but than again I got a master's and she didn't at that time so I somewhat understood. So to say that this was hard is a gross understatment. I think I cried for an hour afterwards. By the way Bill told me he never had any intentions to spank me. He just said that becasue he knew it would get me to act. He's right I have a big responsility to make sure the comapny is running correctly. You know this is why once home I don't want to think about anything. Thanks everyone for your support. You'll are great. Wolfie I was getting worried where have you been? Love can't always be seen or heard but will always be felt with your heart
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Pagan
Spanko Username: Pagan
Post Number: 391 Registered: 05-2005
| Posted on Wednesday, April 12, 2006 - 07:50 pm: |
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I feel for you, Red. I really do. Firing people is never easy...but the first is the hardest. The first person I had to fire was a 48 year-old single mother of two. I absolutely agonized over it. She was not dishonest but was grossly incompetent. I took over the area, and she was responsible for putting contracts together for our clients to review/sign. She was almost THREE YEARS behind. I worked with her for several months. Promises...nothing. Her reviews indicated that she had been meeting expectations. When I asked former bosses how that was possible...I got excuses. No one wants to be the bad guy. I offered another subordinate a cash bonus to help her get out of the hole. She didn't do one minute of overtime...and managed to do all of this other woman's work as well, and get caught up in 12 business days. Anyway...long story short. I fired her. It was incredibly hard. Really. I can't tell you how much sleep I lost over it. Rank has its privileges, and its responsibilities. People don't realize how hard it is unless they've been there. And you also are dealing with a personal betrayal, which makes it all the harder. I bet you feel a huge relief now that it's over. |
Redhinney
Spanko Username: Redhinney
Post Number: 391 Registered: 10-2005
| Posted on Thursday, April 13, 2006 - 06:59 pm: |
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Pagan, Yes I am glad it is over but as you know my company is small only 50 employees and so many of us have known each other from various other jobs so in a way we all have long ties. And it is these ties that make this hurt more than anything. Her sister works for me, and to be honset this morning she was not a happy camper but as you said it goes with the rank. The one good thing is she didn't charge any of your "fake" time or expense to clients that get changed by the hour plus expenses only on projects that were flat rated. I didn't have to give any client a credit so it doesn't ruin the companies standing with them but it hurts so much. I am more than fair with everyone. For example starting June 1 every Friday we all leave by 2:00 the latest and they still get the same amount of money in thier pay checks I don't reduce their pay even when most leave by 12:00 so I am paying them for 5 hours a week during the summer that no one works. I do that until Labor day. I remiburse everyone for $200.00 of medical co-payments in addtion to paying for all thier health insurance which is a great plan with dental, eye care and prescriptions coverage. They get 15 hoildays a year at least 2 weeks vacation and 5 personal days. If you have to leave early one day make it up the next or during that time period and all, is ok no one and I mean no one has a use a time clock it is all honor system. I made arrangment for a wellness program and the company will pay for the first $200.000 of a gym memembership if you can prove that you have gone at least 2 times a week for 3 months. I never got that and as a nurse I sure did need a gym memebership to make me strong enough to lift the patients. I can go on but what is the point. She made me feel like I can't trust anyone the really bad thing is when I was coming up as a RN I looked up to her now I feel like a big fool. So yes I am relieved that it is over but I still have all these other feelings to deal with. Again thank you. Love can't always be seen or heard but will always be felt with your heart
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Otter
New member Username: Otter
Post Number: 17 Registered: 03-2006
| Posted on Thursday, April 13, 2006 - 11:40 pm: |
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I have been thinking about this. I think that, for me, once the situation was all done, I think a spanking might help me then. When I get stressed out about something, sometimes once I've dealt with it, I hang on to it and dwell on it. A spanking sometimes helps me let go of all that and gets my brain out of the self feeding loop it sometimes gets into when I'm stressed. Also it reminds me just how much I can lean on my husband and reminds me of our relationship and helps me to reconnect with him because when I am stressed I often shut myself off from him and other people. But not as punishment, just as reconnection. Just my thoughts. Sorry for your trouble, too! "It was something magic out of something frightening. That's how I live my life, I take it as it comes. In my mind I see the rocking horse inside the tree." -Sara Evans
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